SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING! My my my. It's been nearly 3 months since I last update my blog.



I'm sorry as for the past few months I have been busy or I don't really have the time to really blog. Well, I'm updating it now! :D



Lately, I have been a tweet addict. Oh my... Well, to those who have twitter follow me @ashleykid *grins* Thanks!



There's a lot of things in mind lately and at times I feel quite frustrated at some things but where should I begin? Hmm?



I guess it's not that easy to find a really true best pal. I am fortunate to have at least a best pal. I don't need a lot of friends. I prefer having a few true friends to a lot of friends but not someone who you are close with.



I may have bad temper at times and I can be talkative. However, I can also be a good listener and as a human I can also shut up if there's a need to. What I don't understand is people tend to judge people quickly. I am not a saint but come on, I'm human and I have feelings. You have feelings too because you're human so why are you quick to judge people?



Alright, so at times I am also perhaps quick to judge people but as I slowly learn or find out I feel bad. However, these days I try not to judge people quickly. I'm trying hard to understand people actually but there are times where I just don't understand why a person does a certain thing.



People love to say "It's my mouth, I have the rights to say anything". Sure it's your mouth and you have the rights to make comments. However, have you ever think IF you were in that situation, how would you feel? Well, if one thinks that way about their mouth, what do you think are the chances of them reflecting about it? ZERO. It makes me sad to be honest. As I have mentioned, I am not a saint but I am trying hard to try and understand things. I know it's not easy but I am trying my best to.



Another word for it - "Considerate". Speaking of it, I feel I have been quite considerate for my past 19 years and 10 months old to the extend I feel sometimes I should be selfish. I feel that I am not being treated fairly at times and probably people are blind to see that I have been quite considerate.



It annoys me when one says I AM SELFISH and stuff like that. To those people who say that - Well, I guess I should not bother about what you say. Yeah, say what you want. Call me arrogant or whatever you want. You are not in my position and YOU DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL.



I am not asking for anything. All I'm asking for is at least appreciate me and acknowledge it. That's the thing with people. People take things for granted and that's really sad. As I grow older, I treasure things dearly. Ok, perhaps there are times where I do take things for granted but when I reflect back, I feel very bad. I feel guilty and that's where I kept reminding myself - Cherish the things you have.



Another thing that annoys me is I don't understand why do I have to meet jerks along the way. Annoying jerks that annoys me. The ones that would bug you like crazy and scare you. Why do I say that? Well, those type of people are the type that would keep messaging you be it by text message, instant messaging or on the social networking site (such as Facebook for example).



Perhaps this is a test by the almighty one above. I just wonder how long more can I stay strong. Sometimes I wonder why do the things that I HATE are the things that come to me. I remember there was once my dad said this to me "The more you hate, the more you will meet/experience". Err? Something like that he said.



Oh boy. That quote makes me wonder again. I just want peace. I don't want such idiotic jerks. You can't be like running away (in other words avoiding them) all the time right? I have been putting up with all these stupid nonsense for the past 4 to 5 years (yes, since those days in Secondary).



To think about it... Perhaps that's why I don't trust people too easily (guys especially). Well, I am not saying all guys are bad. I do acknowledge that there are some guys who are nice but why do I just have to meet those annoying people? Boohoo! It's unfair. Oh why, oh why!?



I guess that's the reason why I am quite cautious in a way.



Speaking of being cautious, perhaps that kind of hinders my so-called "love life". Oh god. It's really like non-existent. How should I put it? Hmm? Basically, it's like this... Whenever I like someone, that person doesn't feel the same way. The person that I DON'T LIKE, likes me. Seems like I'm somewhat 'luckless'. Then again, it's not like the end of the world. I still believe I could find the right person in the future.



So what if I'm like eyeing and drooling and such? I don't know why but it seems I haven't really found the one I suppose? The last time I really really DO like someone was like four years ago and I like that person for a long time actually. DESPITE me having litte crushes on a few other people but actually, deep in my heart I like that only one.



Oh well... That's the past. Let's not talk about it. I've moved on and it's been years. When one says or asking me to go and find a date I just wonder - Who? You see... I probably just have some infatuations for some people but it's not the same feeling that I used to have for a person. Err? Get what I mean? Ok, I mean - I just have infatuations but I am not sure if I really do like the person because I just don't feel the kind of feeling that I should feel (have?).



So I don't see a NEED TO RUSH TO FIND A DATE. Cut it out. Frankly, it's annoying. Sure it's a harmless thing but I really don't need people to like keep BUGGING me to go on a date and such. PLEASE RESPECT MY DECISION and not FORCE ME. You are just pressurising me.



Perhaps that's why I feel that sometimes it doesn't pay to be nice. Just because I seem to be a nice person doesn't mean you can step on my head. You have not seen the other side of me. I don't want to show that side because if I do, it won't be nice. Come on, is respect a difficult thing to do? I am not asking for money or anything like that. So why would that even be a difficult thing to do?



Tsk tsk. Hey, that's life. Arghhhhh! Got to live with it. *roll eyes* Oh well...



Alright, enough of it already. Moving on now...



Aha! I mentioned about twitter earlier in this post. Guess what? I guess I'm a tweet addict now. A year ago when I first created it (to see what's all the huha about), I think it's kind of silly. Who knew I would turn to be an addict recently? Oh my. I have been tweeting via text message actually but lately, I have been quite active ONLINE. Yes, logging in to twitter and actually surf around and tweet. I prefer using TweetDeck actually but it's only on my laptop. If I'm using my dad's laptop (the laptop that I use for school, I don't have it).



The power of twitter. I hope I don't get brainwashed! LOL. Tweet tweet! Tweet-weet-beep-beep.



Alright, I shall end here for today. I will try and blog again tomorrow or should I say later.



As for now,
Peace out~