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My Past Illusions
// My Illusions*
Thursday, October 11, 2007
I'm usually a positive person. In fact, most of the time I tell myself to look on the brighter side and always try to think positively.
However, it's impossible for me to keep doing that. Besides, we're humans. Humans have emotions and feelings.
It's impossible for one to always be so positive and always cheering yourself up. I mean, you can't lie to yourself about how you feel.
I don't know but out of the blue, I just feel upset. To be frank, I'm actually sad in a way.
It's really hard to describe how I feel but you know, as humans, I guess it's ok to feel sad at times. I mean it's part of us being human right? However, being sad too often is bad.
I guess people don't see my sad side as they usually see a happy or maybe at times angry Diane. Maybe I'm quite good at hiding my sadness. I'm actually quite impressed by it.
Then again, I guess it can be bad as people always assume you're mostly happy and loud.
Hmm? What about inner thoughts then? Well, I don't share everything. I keep certain things to myself as I fear people would laugh. I hate being laughed at. It isn't a nice feeling.
Umm... I don't know but maybe those situation that I've encountered before makes me react this way.
I don't know if I'm really that easy-going. In fact, I don't think I'm too easy-going as at times I take things seriously. I do joke - If I am in that mood, I'll not take things seriously. Other than that, mostly I take it seriously.
Call me naive. Yes, at times I'm a little naive but at times I have doubts. When I do, I'll be very cautious with my decisions. I'm mostly quite aware of what I do, so whatever I do - Most of the time I'm quite wary.
I do find it difficult to trust a person at times. Well? I'm quite open with that and nothing has change that one bit. However, at times I'm a little naive. Then again, mostly I always try to be wary.
It's quite painful when people don't recognise something good about you. In fact, I feel people always remember the mistakes that you did instead of the good qualities or good deeds.
I really feel that people should look at a person's overall and not judging people blindly.
People can talk bad about me or anything like that. At the end of the day, I know who I am and I know what type of person I am.
Sometimes when I look at others, I kind of envy them. I really do envy them. They're quite easy-going and quite laidback for certain situations. When I look at myself, at times I'm not so easy-going.
Like I mentioned, I can be quite wary. I guess I react differently in certain situations are due to the experience that I've gone through in my entire 17 years.
However, one thing still remains and nothing could change it and that is - I can't stand guys being disrespectful to others.
Seriously, people who disrespect others should not even be respected. I'm nice, if you're nice to me. If you respect me, I'll respect you too. Basically, it works that way. I always expect double standard.
Oh well... I guess I shouldn't think of it.
Hmm? Did I found something to sort of cheer me up now? I guess so?
Guess what is it? A friend praising me about something. *grins* It somehow makes me smile and also I guess - Listening to Britney Spears' "I'm A Slave For You". That's actually one of my favourite songs.
As for now... I'll leave it to music to heal me.
Oh yes, they'll be a new blogskin soon! Though I can't say when. I've also updated my other blog earlier on. Hmm? Also a little bit of changes. (http://fantasy-x72.blogspot.com)
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠1:56:00 am♠
// D: Illusionist
+ Diane
+ Anne, Ashley Kid, Silencer-D, D-Illusionist
+ 0ctober 4th 1990
+ Libra
+ Single and swinging, not looking - Likes making new friends
+ Mixed
(Chinese, Malay, Peranakan, Indonesian)
+ Park View Primary School (1997 - 2002)
+ Hai Sing Catholic School (2003 - 2006)
+ ITE College East (Info-Comm Technology; 2007 - 2008)
+ Currently: Singapore Polytechnic (Digital Media)
BLUE IS THE COLOUR
// What does your sleeping position says about you?
What Your Sleeping Position Says
Friends consider you to be kind, caring, and truly loyal.
You are easy going and trusting. However, you are too sensible to fall for mind games.
Open to the world, you are not afraid to be yourself.
If you don't get enough sleep, you are: Able to cope
It's hard to sleep next to you because: You're a bed hog
// What's your love type
Your Love Type: ISFJ
In love, you are quietly intense, devoted, and tend too hold on too long.
For you, sex is a way to get closer - and a way to take care of your partner.
Overall, you are altruistic and eager to please your sweetie.
However, you tend to also be non-confrontational and secretly frustrated with relationship issues.
Best matches: ESTP or ESFP
// Are you too picky when it comes to men?
You Are Picky When it Counts
But you're also willing to put up with a few flaws in your Mr. Right
You should congratulate yourself on having a realistic approach to dating.
You probably have quite a few great guys you can date!
// What kind of sexy girl are you?
You Are Fun Sexy
Guys always have a great time with you, and that alone is sexy.
You've got an upbeat, optimistic spirit that totally shines through.
Any guy would be crazy to turn you down!
// What kind of girl are you?
You are a Brainy Girl!
You know a little bit about everything, and you're always dying to know more.
For a guy to win your heart, he's got to share some of your intellectual interests.
A awesome book collection of his own doesn't hurt either!
// Are you spoiled?
You Are 24% Spoiled
You appreciate each gift you're given - and you don't dwell on what you "deserve" to have.
// What flavour Pocky are you?
You Are Flan Pocky
East meets west... sweet meets salty.
You're a pro at bringing unusual combos together!
// Could you be violent?
There's a Chance You Could Be Violent
Sometimes your anger gets the best of you, and end up regretting how you act.
Try to curb your temper more often. It only has to get out of control once to do some damage.
// Speed test
95 words
// —The Voice Within—
// Other Illusionist♠
Special links:
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Ms Angeline
Class Blog - 1A/03 ['o9]
Meet The Illusi♠nist:
Adib
Aiba
Aidyl
Amelia
Andrew
Atiiyah
Azizah
————
Berwin
Belson
————
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Clara
————
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Dickson (Snoopy)
Donn
————
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————
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Faezzah [2]
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Fiqah♦
Fyeqa
————
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Gary's Lover Den
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Gladys
Grace
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Guo Wei
————
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————
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————
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Jamie
Jason
Jia Hao
Jiekie
Jian Sheng
Jiayi
Jun Rong (JR)
————
Ken
————
Lee Ying
Leon
————
Marcus
————
Naqiah*
————
Pearline♦
Pei Jun
————
Radhi
Razin
Ratna
————
Saiful
Sani
Sarah
Shakila
Sherin (Yi Xin)
Shikin
Shi Min
Shu Min
Sya
Syakirah
————
Wei Wei
Wendy
Weng Hon
————
Yi Xuan (Shiin)
Yue Han
The Other Side Of D
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// Misc*
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