How would you define? I think it's universal. It's a very strong word.

Looking at those past memories. I miss my friends. I miss those days. I miss everything. Oh that joy and those laughter. Gosh. It brings a smile to my face. Remembering how innocent and kiddy we could be. How naive in other words.

I'll REMEMBER THEM and THEY ARE PART OF MY LIFE
JOURNEY.

......

• A friend that I'll not forget. A friend that has taught me a lot. A kind soul and a very supportive friend. I remember her being there for me and giving me advices. Someone who lends me a listening ear when I'm in need of a hearing ear.
  
• It's nice knowing her and I definitely did not regret knowning her for like 9 years.

DARLENE

• It's always nice to know her. She's a very friendly girl and a genius too. Supportive friend and a sweet girl. I definitely did not regret knowning her. To know her for like 6 years or so, definitely adds sweetness into my life.

JACLYN

• Definitely did not regret knowning her. It's been like 12 years and I'm glad to have a friend like her. Good or bad, whatever it is... Those memories makes me smile whenever I think of it. Though we may not spend much time ever since we're in Secondary school onwards, that doesn't mean we're not longer friends. It's nice to have friends like you and it's nice to know you.
  

PEARLINE

• 6 years and going. Though we may not spend much time but our friendship is still there and I'll not forget you. Never did I once forget about you as you add joy to my life especially in Primary 6. Those happy times. It makes me smile whenever I think back about it.

• Back then when we were young, naive and innocent. Things may change and people may change but I don't think our friendship has changed. To have you as a friend is something really special and what more can I ask for? Hmm? Maybe a BOOM! ...And yes, victory is mine! I bombed your PEARL GANG. Oops! *grins*
  

Not forgetting my cockroach friend.

XIAOQIANG (ANGIE!)

• Life with you during my Secondary school days has always been fun. The cockroach and the ant. Hmm? Ok. Our nicknames. *grins* It sure was nice to know you. I had lots of fun! Definitely it puts a smile to my face and makes my life interesting.

• Though I always tease you and you teasing me too! Life's always full of fun and happiness. We fool around, fool others, fooling each other... Hmm? TO BE A FOOL? Oops. We also work hard and study! Hmm? Of course, I always get tricked by the cockroach. Always giving me heart attack.

• We fool around, we "eyed", we may argue at times but well? Nothing too serious. Calling each other names, teasing and of course, how can I forget? To tease you with "Mar". LOL!

• Life has been interesting when you're around. Especially in upper Secondary. I feel at peace and of course, sorry for those tempers at times! However, to have a friend like you means so much to me. I'm happy that you are my friend. I just don't know what to say. I think no words could describe it anymore. Oh my god, oh my god. Oh no! I think my heart exploded! LOL. Ok, just kidding on that part. (I mean the "Oh my god" part.)

To describe about those people that adds joy to my life, I really just don't know what to say. I think I'm speechless. Dumbfounded. Silent. Hmm? More like a mute. Those above are those that I treasure. Of course - Those that I did not mention does not mean I dislike you or hate you. Hmm? Ok, maybe some I hate. Oops.

Well? Nothing so serious. Those people who has or should I say had (Oh dear, whatever it doesn't matter) walked in and out of my life, somehow it makes a difference. It may not be a huge gap or anything like that but even if it's a slight difference, it still means something to me. I'm just simply glad for what I've had and what god has given me.

Not forgetting that I have such good friends that I met this year! My buddies: Fiqah! Amelia and Gladys. Like I mentioned earlier on, doesn't mean if I did not mention your name you're nobody to me. You're still my friend. Hmm?

It's always a challenge. An obstacle is always waiting for you and it's always at sight. However, the key thing here is to be strong and determined. Having the courage is important I guess. It's an essential role and it's something we should have in our life.

Though things are not always the way you wanted it to be. Be an optimist. Stay positive.

Of course there are times I'll feel down. For example like last night while I was chatting with my drama friend (Shu Min). We were talking about to like someone and stuff like that. To tell her my "story", it somehow reminds me of how much of a failure I can be when it comes to this matter. It saddens me a little, however... I kept telling myself that it's over.

Yes, it's over, it's gone and it's just memories of the past. However, there's this part of me that reminds me of a failure I can be. Guess life's like that. You just got to live with it. Like it or not. Welcome to reality.

No matter how much you try staying positive. Surely, they'll be a time whereby you'll feel low. What am I to say? We're humans and it's alright to feel that way at times as we have emotions and feelings.

This world can be cruel. Well? I guess you have to be a fighter.

Hmm? Anyway, looking back at this year... Goodness me. I think I spent a lot of money on myself. Seems like I'm on a spree this year. It's almost July and to reflect on what I have done since beginning of the year, I just feel I have been on some sort of a spree at times.

Last week I bought two tank tops and two cardigans at Bossini. I saved $44. Hmm? I feel that clothes at Bossini and G2000 blu are the kind of clothes that I fancy. Casual,comfortable yet stylish. Well? If you know how or what to pair it with, you'll look good.

Furthermore, the prices are reasonable. If you want to wait for promotions, that'll be a plus. I don't mind buying during promotions, in fact - I really like it.

If you could save, why not? I like Bossini pants. They cost $43 but if you managed to get it on promotion, you could just get a pair of Bossini pants for like $27 to $29. I feel it's worth it.

The reason why I like their pants is that not only it's comfortable, it's more of like wrinkle-resistance kind. That's plus plus I guess.

Hmm? Recently I also tried online shopping. It's my first time shopping online for clothes. There are different range and different places you could do such things. Auctions for instance, new or used clothes, bags and all those you could get it cheaper.

I got mine new on a website that has lots of clothes range. However, I just decided to get 1 first for the time being as it's only my first time doing online shopping.

I did an electronic transfer. It'll be delievered to me in about a week or a week and half time. (7 to 10 days)

I feel it definitely has a lot of range of clothes. It's nice and easy to do online shopping as all you have to do is just click click - tada!

However, you too should be smart shopper. As you know, the cyber space isn't safe so you have to be smart too. To prevent being conned. There are such scams and I just feel that these people who scam others are heartless people.

How would they feel if it's them? Definitely, it'll be an unpleasant feeling.

Anyway, I feel that online shopping is good if you which websites to go to and to get clothes that aren't selling in Singapore. That way it's like - unique! Hmm? Just my view on it.

Hmm... So far I'm only a registered member in two sites only. I didn't bother to join others as I feel that this two could be trusted. Well? I just feel that way.

Anyway, July 1st is approaching and soon Good and Service Tax (GST) will increase to 7%! Singapore is just too expensive. Living in Singapore... You just have to have money! Without money, it's really hard.

I'm talking about money in a good way, not in a corrupted way or whatsoever!

To have money is an advantage. To not have it makes your life difficult as to even go out to take a transport you need money to pay for your public transport. Sheesh. If I am not wrong, the GST in United Kingdom (U.K) is 10%! Will Singapore be like them someday? Oh dear... I hope not.

I'll be a heartache. It'll be worries and white hair I guess as you'll be constantly thinking of money. Well? Maybe for us students we may not have that yet but definitely in the future, it'll be tough. Hmm? Even to see my father to worry, I think it won't be a nice feeling.

I guess Singapore is just full of money everywhere you go. To earn 3K, I guess is just enough for a family. Hmm? Maybe people should be paid at least 5K. Hmm? What do you think? Or will it still be not enough? Is "Never enough" the answer? Hmm... Well........ I'll leave that as an open-ended answer then.

Alright, I think I better be going. CCA DAY TOMORROW. Oh wait. TODAY - Later on. Yawns yawns yawns.

Yes I am yawning. I will end here for now. Oh panda panda panda! Boohoo! Panda eyes.

Peace out~

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

I really don't know how I'm feeling. I'm just feeling that I'm in a mix of things.

Goodness me but I just... Well? Ok,it can be confusing. Happy or what? Dang! Oh why,oh why...

Sheesh. As much as I hate it or as much as I love it... I'm tongue tied.

Oh well...

Anyway,TODAY is the release of RESULTS! How do I fair you might ask. That's a secret. I'm not telling. Only a few people knows. Hmm? Let's play some games. To give some hint, I am not a FOUR pointer. Figure out yourself then.

It's how you think of me and how you look at me as a person. You judge it then.

La La LA... Speaking of games... I actually hate being "punked" but I like to punk people. Oops! Ok,I'm a little playful but I don't mean any harm. For what I know some people simply wants to harm me in a way! Boohoo! That's not right!

If you think to hurt or to offend people is something funny? Think again then. THE ANSWER IS... YOU ARE SO WRONG!!!

Whatever I do,I never have the intention of hurting anyone. That's what I always tell myself - Never to hurt anyone.

Well,well well... This is reality. All sorts of people in this world. What can I say after all?

Sometimes I love being "stupid". I want to see how far a person goes and how sincere the person is. I want to see their true colours and how they really think of me.

When I am very serious,I can share things. Share stories or experience or simply just help you out whenever I'm possible or whatever I am capable of.

Last year,this time of the year... I was for English. It has been tiring to be top for English. Though I have to admit is a great feeling and I am always fighting for it.

Then again,sometimes it's tiring because people call you names like "action","arrogant" just because you managed to top a few subjects. For which in my case: English,Computer Application and Elements of Office Administration. It sure is tiring.

What's more if your Science teacher pressures you? You're someone who gets Top 10 for Science and your teacher pressures you to get A1 for N level?

Well... It has their good points and bad points. Sometimes I like being pressurised. It makes me work harder. To speak the truth,I miss that very much.

Subjects that I didn't care was... Chinese and Mathematics. Seriously,I don't like those subjects. However I am always trying to get at least a 4 for Mathematics somehow. EVEN THOUGH I dislike the subject.

Chinese? Oh dear. Don't even bother as I know I'll fail. That's a definite answer.

I remember people laugh at me when I didn't do well in my whole entire four years of secondary school for Mid-years examinations. Just because I got 11th position. Didn't do well. I did bad for what I can say. Not up to par.

I just let them laugh. As I know I am capable just that I don't how or why I just lost focused in a mist of the event. Being an optimist,I told myself to prove them wrong by getting back the position that I would usually get.

Which is being in the TOP 5.

Preliminary examinations - I took it very serious. Speaking the truth,it was the time that I started to study for my N level examinations too. Yes,they say don't ever study a month or two before N levels but guess what? I did that.

Results came out and 4th position. Though I am still not impressed with my grades. I worked even harder. Though I have to admit I was still very lazy.

I only study very hard when it's like a week before N levels.

Well... It was all in the past already. I felt I should get FOUR 1's. HAHA. Hey,looking on the bright side... To get 2 is also an A. Meaning to say 4 A's. Was quite pleased. To think of those achievements I got during my FOUR YEARS in Secondary School was quite pleasing to the eye.

Best Trainee Award for Elective Module [Digital Animation],Best in Standard or something like that for Social Studies,four straight years collecting award during Speech Day,getting 2nd in class for the whole year in Secondary 3... Not forgetting getting 2nd for N levels.

Ahhhhhh! Goodness me. I love those memories but their in the past. We have to look ahead. I told my parents I got 3. My mother told me to do better next time. She was encouraging me. It's nice to have supportive people around. It makes you feel better.

Wonder how I would fair if I am in a course that interest me so much. Something like Digital Animation or Digital Media Design or ...Digital Audio Video Production. (Did I get that right?)

I really like those kind. It's not that I can't apply for those courses back then,just that I'm thinking about my future. I fear it might be difficult to get jobs. Therefore,being silly if you put it this way... I chose Info-communications Technology.

Hmm? The other day when I was with my mother at Arab Street. We were in this shophouses shop looking at those eggshell vases,the lady asked me how old am I? I told her coming to 17. She then asked what course am I taking? So I told her... "Info-comm".

Her response was... "Oh! Good! My son was from that course too! Girl,I tell you... You won't regret."

Actually,inside - I'm regretting a little because if you talk about interest,I like those that I've mentioned above. However,it isn't that bad. At least I learn something. Digital Animation? Well,I can somehow learn or teach myself on my own. Sometimes I guess we have to make sacrifices.

Hmm... Well,to those who got GPA 4 - You're good. Well? Remember: Humble's the word! I know some would be over-confident. Hey,look at it... Anything is possible.

Today you may be on top,the next day or so who knows someone else may be on top of you?

The key thing is: Just focus and don't give up. If that is what you want,go for it. Give it your best shot. No matter what the end result,try till you get. I always believe in that.

Oh well... I think I better be going now.

Darn. Butt's aching.

Peace out.~

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Phew~ What a day. A lot of walking! Went to Arab Street with my mother earlier on. Hmm? Somewhere near Beach Road area. Isn't my first time there. Hmm? Well? I don't usually go there. I've been there before during the Fasting month.

Anyway,my mother went to those shop houses type of shop to buy those vases. She bought a few of them that were made using eggshells. Well,well,well... I have to tell you that my mother likes those vases a lot. If you ever come to my house before,you'll know what I'm talking about.

Oh boy. My mother spent more than $350 today,definitely less than $500. She bought for me a batik too. Oh dear... It was tiring. We decided to take a rest,so we went to eat something light.

As we were eating my brother called me to tell my mother and I to meet him and my dad at Funan. Well,I told him to tell my dad that we'll be late.

Heck! We continued eating.

After eating we went to meet my dad. After we reached,we met him and we ate dinner at KFC. You there's this joint outlet whereby there's KFC/Taco Bell and Pizza Hut so yeah... I ordered Lasagne! My mother ate the same thing too whereas my dad and my brother ate the Miso Chicken.

They then decided to go home but I didn't want to. Boohoo! I want to shop!

Well - My wish was granted. My dad and my brother took whatever my mother had shopped earlier on and went home.

Just myself and my mother! After dinner,we went to Suntec City Mall. One of my favourite place to shop for clothes especially with the shops that are opened on the 3rd floor.

I bought a dress and a skirt. Both white. I like them very much. I think their very nice and guess what? The dress is the last one! Last piece! Lucky Diane. Oh,lucky day. Why did I say that? Well,the other day when I wanted to buy a skirt from the same shop,the skirt was the last one! Seems like today those items that I bought are the last piece left.

Well? Since it's the last piece,I got a 10% discount for my dress. It actually cost $32. You do you mathematics. You'll get the answer. As it states there in the shop,for every second item you buy,you'll get a 20% discount for the 2nd item.

Woohoo. My skirt (which happens to be the last one too!) cost me $29. Well? With the 20% discount is much lesser. I only paid $52 for those two.

Darn. The only thing I can't remember is the shop name but if I am not wrong they have a shop at Far East Plaza too.

Seems like I've been enjoying my recent shopping trips to Suntec very much. Besides I think I bought a number of clothes from Suntec City this year.

I'd definitely look forward to do more shopping there.

Besides all I can say it's more like an all-in-one as they have ALDO store,they have G2000 blu! Bossini too. Stores that I like. They have "Newbie" too. Oh yes,not forgetting "eXtreme".

Cool cool cool! Yeah,that's all I could think of for now.

I guess that's one of the reasons why Suntec City and Marina Square is one of my favourite shopping places. Marina Square has John Little now. My mother loves shopping at John Little and oh boy,the John Little store at Marina Square has a wide range of things to shop. Clothes,shoes - Well? What have you.

I still go to Orchard once a while but currently,Suntec is one of my favourite places to shop at,at the moment. It has been one of my favourite malls for like years.

Well... All I can say is... I'm one happy DIANE at the moment. I wanted to shop more but I'm so tired. Besides,some items aren't worth to buy as there aren't much discounts. I'm looking around to see first.

Compare price and buy them when I think it is the right time. Some may think that "so kiasu". I don't think it's "kiasu". I think you should be a smart shopper. Think and be wise with your money.

With that I spent earlier on,I saved $9. Some people will think $9 only?! Well,you know that $9 could get you a meal at least.

Oh well...

The Great Singapore Sales is until next month - I still have a lot of time to look at things before buying.

Our final stop was at Marina Square. My mother went to John Little to buy clothes. I suggested that she should apply for the John Little card and she applied for it. I feel it's worth it that way as she likes shopping at John Little. After which,we were tired. We decided to head home as we were out since like 1PM.

Reached home at about 9.30pm. I definitely have to drop by the Night Market (Pasar Malam) at Pasir Ris Interchange to buy a burger first. Well,things are just the way I wanted it to be and I'm just so glad about it. What a smooth flowing day!

Hmm... It's 20th June today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO FRANK LAMPARD AND SAMIR NASRI! Aww... Nas is like 20 years old! You know what? He doesn't look like 20! Super Frank's like 29 years old.

Oh boy! Wait. I almost forgot. It means tomorrow is 21st! Arghhhhh! My dad's birthday! Boohoo! I didn't bought for him a gift yet. Boohoo.

Oh well... I guess maybe I'll make a card for him. *grins* Well? At least there's something! Better than nothing!

Alright,I'm off now.

Hmm... Maybe I should watch "AIR" again. Darn. I kind of like that Japanese animation. Dang!

Peace out.

♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠12:54:00 am♠

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Oh boy,oh boy... I just feel so lazy.

Woke up about two hours ago. 2pm that is. It's about 5 minutes to 4PM. Well? My mother has to wake me up again! Boohoo! Well? The other day I woke up at 3PM! Goodness me. Oh my.


Yes,I think some of you are calling me a pig already.

You can't blame me can you? It's holidays!~ Basically I sleep very late therefore I wake up late. I slept at 5AM. The other day I slept at about 6.40AM. The holidays before this,there were a few times I slept at 7AM! Why? Well... Simple. I was watching UEFA Champions League matches.

I know it's no wise to sleep very late but I can't help it. Seems like good stuff happens at night. What I mean is... Those good things that "tempts" me are all in the middle of the night!

Yes,the temptation is very good indeed. To the extend I'm willing to stay awake just to catch that live match. Hmm? Ok,there are times I can resist the temptation and not catch it live - ESPECIALLY if I have school on the next day! I definitely don't want to be a zombie.

UNLESS school ends early the following day then I may consider.

Hmm... Anyway,yesterday I had drama class. Had drama meeting too. I'm a little lost at first as I joined them a little late. I'm the treasurer for my club and not just any treasurer by the way. My role is somewhat equal with the secretary role. If his not there,I am to take over his position and take notes.

He wasn't present for the meeting and I was given a task to type out a Minutes of Meeting. Guess what? For a moment I have mixed feelings. I don't know if it's good or bad.

Good thing is that I've learnt it before in Elements of Office Administration (E.O.A) class in Secondary School. Bad thing is I'm a little rusty. Maybe some of my secondary classmates will be like, "I thought you're good at it."

Well? That was then I guess. I haven't been typing it for quite a while so I'm a little rusty but I know how the format goes.

I'm not so into the Shoulder format. I dislike that kind of format actually but guess what? If I am not wrong we were supposed to do that for N levels practical. Ok,it wasn't so bad. Anyway,Elements of Office Administration is a subject whereby you could easily score A1. Yes - 1.

It's not so difficult. Some may complain saying theory is difficult. I don't know but seems to be that both are equally the same except theory you have to memorise more things but once you get the hang of it - You'll be fine.

I dislike that subject,it's my second least favourite subjects during Secondary but it's strange I'd say. It is my second least favourite subjects but I am able to do very well in that subject. However,for my Chinese - I am unable to do the same. Well? I have to say I am really very weak in it. Besides,I usually speak English.
Alright,before I get carried away - Let's continue.

Hmm... Ok,so I managed to type it out but I did asked a few friend to help me check the format. Well? Even though I know it is right but I need someone to help me confirm that. I mean - Never be over-confident so yeah,got a few friends to help me check.

PASS is what they say. Meaning to say - They said it's ok. Alright,it's over! Woooo. *grins*

Boohoo! I just ate finished my Chicken Pau. Yum yum! Darn. I'm thinking of food now. I feel like having pizza. Yes,I think some may be calling me "PIG" again. What am I to do? Tasty food out there! Aww... Come on. Enjoy them by eating it. Pamper yourself with tasty food.

HOWEVER,I do not encourage unhealthy food to be taken regularly. What I mean is... ONCE A WHILE. I still think good health goes a long way. So - Take care of yourself and love yourself. You only have one life to live so make use of it wisely.

"To love is an all so different story but to be love the feeling is so great."

Darn darn darn. I'm missing a lot of things now. I'm beginning to feel that in the past week or so. I miss reading novels! Novels like: "In Her Shoes","Everyone Worth Knowing" that kind of stories. A little bit of romance and comedy in it would be nice but I definitely don't like it too be too much romance.

I'm somewhat missing not singing the National Anthem. I'm also somewhat missing not taking the Pledge. I miss those days in Secondary school. Not forgetting the memories in Primary school too.

I miss "eyeing". I miss fooling around.

What can I say after all? It's over and it's done. The memories of yesterday,the memories of the past... That's why they are called "memories" as you are not able to undo whatever's happened and whatever that has past. For what you can look forward to in anticipation is the future.

WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS FOR US.

Sometimes it's sad when the people you know changed. Frankly speaking,I feel very sad when I know certain people that I know changed. I wished it could be in the past but there's no point in crying over a spilled milk.

It's gone,it's done - It's over.

However, I still think I am almost the same DIANE that they know then and now. I don't think I change that much. I mean definitely there are some changes but if you talk about terms of personality and character... I still feel I am the same person.

It's hard to convience others that you are this type of person or you're not that type of person but sometimes people just judge you without carefully study you well. That's very sad actually. I don't like that kind of judgement. Well? What are we to say about it? WE'RE HUMANS.

Yes we are but doesn't mean all humans have to think that way. I just feel that you don't have to follow others. Just be yourself - be unique.

Why do you have to like copy others or follow others, just because majority of them are doing it? Come on! BE YOURSELF,speak your mind out! Be unique,take a stand - Be bold and brave.

What more can you ask for? I believe we have our own strengths and weaknesses.

I feel like writing a poem. Hmm? Maybe not. Well,I'll see how.

Damn it feels good to listen to Subsonica's songs. I think I may get their live album. It feels so good. Just feel like screaming. I just can't help the feeling when I listen the songs. It simply makes me feel so good.

Oh darn. Well,I hope you're not getting the wrong idea about it! *grins*

*sigh* I miss the feel good feeling. I haven't been feel at my very best for quite a while. I want to regain that feel good feeling. It simply feels like you're in heaven when you have that good feeling in you. Basically,it's like a boost. You just feel great about everything.

Actually I lost some sense of feeling on certain things.

I forget how it feels like to really like someone very much. I kind of miss the feeling of when you top the class for a certain thing. I forget what do you mean by the meaning to like someone very much. I think I even forget how to like someone.

Oh dear... Yes,it sounds very stupid and lame but I lost that sense of feeling in me. In a way,I don't know if it's good or bad. It could be good,it could be bad... It's how you look at it.

So... What's your point of view?

Anyway,I guess I'll end here for now.

Peace out.

♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠4:36:00 pm♠

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Howdy!

Back with a new skin for my blog. Hmm? Which is better? I've asked some friends for their opinion and some prefer the previous one,whereas some prefer the current one.

Hmm? Before I decided to put this,I actually designed one. (Click to view; below).

So... Which one do you think looks better? The original one or this current one which is the version 2 design?

I appreciate your comments. Hmm? Or do you think the previous skin look better? IF YOU NEED TO SEE THE PREVIOUS ONE,YOU CAN ASK ME TO SEND YOU THE SKIN.

Hmm? Currently just chatting with a few friends and surfing the net. Gosh,I woke up late. 3PM! Goodness. Ate something light. I just don't feel like eating rice.

Had KFC delivery for my dinner and oh boy! It filled my tummy. Supper I just ate chicken again. I think the Miso Chicken is ok. I won't say it's very delicious nor would I say it's very yucky. I think it's just ok.

Hmm? I don't have much time to blog these days but I'll try to blog when I'm free.

Darn. I can't seem to take my eyes off those two on my skin. Samir Nasri on the left and Philipp Lahm on the right.

Oh well... Your comments are appreciated! Do comment and let me know your opinion.

Alright,I think as for now. I'm off.

I've got other things to do BUT I'll update when I'm free.

Peace out!~

♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠3:10:00 am♠

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Humans will always be humans.

The thing about human beings is that we're all different and we can't tell what's in the other person's mind. I just feel that every human beings should be respected.

Hmm? Ok,maybe if it's someone like my enemy kind of thing then maybe I won't respect but majority of them I'll respect. I always believe that if you respect others,others will respect you too.

It's a very nice compliment to get when someone says "You have a very sweet smile". I got a couple of those recently and I think that's a good thing.

Sometimes in life you have to take the good points and the bad points.

Negative points may make pull you down at times and you'll feel down. Whereas positive points will make you feel good and boost your confidence. Well? Either way. However negative points can be good in a way or it can be very hurtful.

Sometimes I choose to ignore. Why bother? Look on the positive side and think of those people who praise you,those people who encouraged you,those people who are always by your side supporting you all the way. Those people deserve full respect and appreciation. Whereas those who doesn't appreciates you,tell them off - "Back off!"

People always think that I'm always happy and all as I usually smile. Sometimes I wonder,does anyone knows how I really feel? Sometimes when I'm sad or feeling down,I don't want to show it. I just tell myself to look on the bright side. I usually try to console myself and keep thinking of the positive things as I'm quite an optimistic person.

However,I am still human. I am no supergirl. I still have feelings and I have emotions. If I am terribly sad,I would cry. Though my friends won't see that as I usually try not to show it. It's either I'm crying inside or I'll go somewhere where nobody could see me with those tears.

I'm not that type who would cry noisily. In fact,it's silent.

Sometimes I wonder... Does being a good person pays? It's not that I'm trying to be a goody or whatsoever. It's just the way I am. It's a habit. Being polite or courteous is somehow part of me. It's a habit now.

I won't say I am an angel nor would I say I am a devil. I think everyone of us has his good side and his "devilish" sides.

Well? I admit that I may have bad temper at times. I can get a little impatient at times and get irritated easily at times. However,at times I'm the total opposite of those.

The one that I want to say the most is that... Do you know how frustrating it can be if nobody quite understands you well. Sometimes I am sick and tired as people likes to go on rattling "You're this,you're that......." kind of pin-pointing. That's ridiculous. HOW CAN YOU JUDGE PEOPLE THAT WAY?!

Sometimes being patient doesn't pays for. Sometimes being that smiley and goofy type who doesn't really care what others say doesn't pays of.

I can be very mean if I want to. IT'S YOUR CHOICE but I didn't choose that. I can be very harsh with my words but I didn't want to. Sometimes you just have to show your other side and just speak your mind out.

Sometimes I guess it's better this way. Speak your mind out and ignore the rest. Sometimes I just feel that that's a good one as sometimes people are just TOO ANNOYING.

Being a nice person doesn't mean you could take advantage.

It's strange you know. Just when you are serious,people starts complaining and request that you be that goofy type. When you're that goofy type,the same thing you'll hear except that they'll ask you to be serious.

You know it's so frustrating. Well? What can I say after all... You can't have everyone liking you. There are some who might hate you but I always try not to cater to those. Like what the heck!

What I mean by that is... If you that person is that type,maybe you'll be serious when you see him or her the next time.

To think about it,if a person hates me without even knowing the person that I am - All I have to say is... Shit you! Why is that so? It's simple. You don't even me yet you dare to have such hatred or whatsoever. I think that's stupid.

Why would you hate someone who you don't know? It's a waste of energy. Come on. That energy could have been put to good use. Why do you want to waste it? Tsk. That's not nice at all.

I don't want to think of hate. All I want to do is to think of love. Love can be anything. It's universal. It's how you look at it and how you define "love".

Then again,if you're unsure of the meaning "love" - I guess you shouldn't use it as it's a strong word. It may be a four letter word that starts with "L" and ends with an "E". However,if you don't mean what you say... There's always an effect that'll affect you or the environment around you.

Some may even want to associate "love" with sex. Some guys would be like - "If you love me...............". Well,you should know what he'll say next.

I just feel that if you really love someone,you should accept his/her flaws. You respect that person and encourage them. I always believe that little things could make a slight difference. It's nice to see someone smiling. I just think that if you love that person,accept that person for who he or she is.

At the end of the day,we're still humans. Everyone has their good and bad points.

However,sometimes I feel that guys are not sensible. I feel stupid when a guy seems like a desperate. It's like as if he is making use of you and he isn't for real. What I mean is... He isn't sincere. He has a motive. That's very sad.

I like a guy who is understanding and sensible. That's a plus.

A guy who is not sensible and not understanding is a minus. That's a BIG NO-NO.

I like my guy to be strong. I like my guy to be understanding and sensible. Caring and patient. I like someone with a sense of humour and is full of surprises.

That's a plus plus plus! Well? That's more like a dream guy I guess. I'm a sucker for sweet guys. Errr... I don't mean sweet talkers! I hate sweet talkers who don't mean anything!

In reality,it's difficult to find the type that you really really want. So far I've met those who are like a bit of this and that only. Not those that I would love to want. Well? This is reality.

In life,you can't have everything. There's always two sides in life. All I can say is... Stay positive!

Yawns! Alright,I think I better be going. It's 4.15AM.

Boohoo! Time flies very fast...
Ok,goodnight!~

♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠4:16:00 am♠

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

HELLO JUNE! Finally I got my computer back! Ok,not the one that's down but a new computer.

I was surprised actually. My dad bought it on Sunday and I've to say it's a good buy. I didn't expect to have a new computer. I thought he would buy a new computer for himself and give his computer to me.

INSTEAD,he bought for me. I just don't know what to say. For a moment,I couldn't believe my ears when he told me that. I'm shocked and surprised. Basically,I was having mixed feelings.

Well,frankly speaking - I am happy. Oh yes - THANK YOU. At least I still have manners. *grins*

Intel Core 2 Duo. Acer. Windows Vista. 1GB RAM. Blah blah blah... Wow wow wow.

I didn't expect those seriously. Who would have thought that I'll be using Windows Vista in the end?

I remember "debating" about Windows Vista. Oh boy,what can I say? I'm using it now. Hmm? It isn't so bad just that I've to get used to it I guess.

Hmm... Well? I'm having mixed feelings.

I am happy,I am worried and I don't know what's the other emotion.

HAPPY because I have such nice friends. HAPPY because I have a new computer. HAPPY because it's holidays!

WORRIED for my exams. WORRIED how I would fair for my overall performance and also for my Grade Point Average (GPA).

The rest? Well,I get irritated easily just now but I'm calm at times. Hmm......
I'm finally free for the pain. Had Engineering Essentials examination earlier on. I wouldn't say it's very difficult nor would I say it's very easy. There were some tough questions but there were also some simple ones.

Well,I hope I'm able to do well.

Well,it's over. What can I say after all? It's done,it can't be undone.

Hmm... Was webcaming with Fiqah just now. Just nice that I've just installed the driver for the webcam and like any devices,you've to test it out right? So yeah,I tested out.

Well? It's holidays for me now and I haven't have lots of plans yet. However friends have been asking me out and I've to look into it to see which day I'm available. Sometimes,when I'm available - they're not and when I'm not,they are! Boohoo!

How sad? Humph! Erughhhh...

Well,football is in my mind now. Euro qualifiers! Estonia vs England tomorrow. Woohoo~ Just can't wait. I feel sorry for the England squad as some fans aren't really supporting them. Instead,they jeer them. I think that's not very nice.

Oh well... Alright,I've to go now.

Peace out~

♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠10:15:00 pm♠