W E L C ♠ M E
// My Illusions*
Monday, October 31, 2005
[ 31.10.05 ]
Looking back at the things that I've done. I was trying to be someone. Hmm...? I wonder who?
Haha.
Well? I was looking at my previous journal entries (Two years ago and last year's) in my previous journal (Easyjournal). Hmm..? I noticed that I talk a lot about boys in that journal. Haha. Well? You people see all those but actually I tell you something. Whoever I say I have feelings for or like,I'm always stuck to ... . Whatever I do,that fella is always on my mind instead of whoever I say I have feelings for. Weird? Oh well... Don't know why but as for now,I don't have anyone in my mind.
Why talk about boys? Forget them. Let's enjoy!
I just don't seem to be the usual me who used to talk about them like I used to. Well? I still do talk about guys but I don't seem to be very interested in them. I don't like anyone. I just feel that there are other stuff way important and better than this. Why bother so much?
Maybe I used to be a sucker for it back then. Not for now yeah? I'm looking at this in my own view. So if you don't like it,let it be that way cause I ain't gonna change for anything. I'm me and I'm simply me. Not more than that. Accept me for who I am. Sometimes I asked myself what's the purpose of living in this world? I mean what are my objectives. I never thought of it back then. I was childish back then. Didn't have that mental to be able to think ahead. Maybe that's why I was weird with stuff I do. I did stuff to what or how I want it to be. It was like my rules,my world. No one can stop me let me have it my way. Well? Sort of. I didn't care much about myself too. All I've always wanted is to be happy everyday. No worries.
"Hello world! Welcome to planet earth."
Yeah. Finally I've woke up from my dream world. Guess it's a little too late? Hmm...? Maybe not. Nevermind,I'll try to be a better person from now on. I don't want to be like what I used to be in the past. Well? There are some things I like about me in the past and some that I don't. If there's a rewind button I think I'll be the first to hit it and undo those mistakes. Better still if there's restart. So I can start anew and forget about those sour memories and only keep those precious ones.
To some,life sucks. Life is hell. Stuff like that. At times I admit that I too think of it that way. But hey! Look on the bright side. This world,there's nothing perfect. Wanna know something?
Ok,let me be honest. As you know I like guys. Blah blah blah. Yes,yes but you know what? I've always wanted the guy to be almost perfect. =X Oops... I spilled my milk. Oh well? What's there to hide? So if like that guy like me and I think his not that perfect I just dislike him. Haha. Stupid right? Yeah but I don't know why. It comes to me naturally. I still remember back then where I treated some of them badly because of that. Oops! Oh well... I hope they'll forgive me. But it's like when I start to like 'em a little,I just don't feel right to go on as they think I either hate them or they just don't feel like what they used to towards me. We took different paths. I feel so bad but I apologize already. Anyway,we're still friends and I'm glad. =) Even though we're friends sometimes we feel a little awkward when we talk about stuff like relationships. Cause we know what happened before but sometimes I feel that feeling again but we know we can't. So we're just friends only.
I've made a lot of mistakes and I know I'm not perfect. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes but we can learn from our mistakes and not make the same mistakes. =)
I'm typing this it's not because I wanna brag or something like that but I hope that whoever who is reading this will look at life in a different view instead of the usual "Life sucks". I never say that I'm very good or innocent. I'm very playful too just like anyone else but all I'm saying is "Think twice before making your decision".
I feel good as I've the time to blog like I used to do. I'll try to blog as often as possible and speak my mind out. =) It's a good way to express myself as sometimes I just couldn't express it like that.
Alright,this is it for this entry.
Now you see me.
D-Illusionist----x
Now you don't.
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠8:49:00 pm♠
Happy Halloween!
=) Oh well? I feel good. It's not like I strike lottery or something but I feel that finally I've the time to blog. Yes,that's what I meant. Not only that. Looking back at my past entries (my easyjournal blog) and this,I feel that I've improved alot. Be it the writing skills or content of it. I feel that I've grown! Haha. It makes me proud.
I remembered clearly two years ago. Back then in 2003. It was like my first time to have a blog. I use those short forms and whatsoever. For example - Friends,I just type it as frenz. Those were the days. I feel that it's time I shouldn't be doing that and start anew and be fresh! Ahhhh... That's the way! Way to go! So it's like if you were to see my past entries of this blog,I don't use any short forms. If you look at my last year's one or the year before,I use short forms. Well? You can see the difference. I think that now and last time,now is way better. Don't you agree? Haha. No matter what,I still think that there are other better bloggers out there who blogs way better than I do. Whatever it is,I'll try my best to make it my very best. I'll try to improve till it's almost perfect. Even if it takes time (years),I don't mind. It's still something to me. Time flies very fast huh? For all you know it's the end of the year.
Today is already 31st of October and tomorrow is 1st of November.
Anyway,"Happy Deepavail" to all Indians. Pretty fast huh? Festive seasons. This coming Thursday is Hari Raya. Sooooooo fast. Hmm? What's the next occasion? ...... Oh! Erm... Let me think. Christmas! New Year! Chinese New Year! Ahhhhh... Yes,now that I've listed them,I remember! =D
Oh well... Junko's gathering is soon. Got to check for the dates. Don't know if I'll still be shy like the first time I met them at OBS. I wonder. Will I be shy or maybe not so?
Let's just wait and see about it.
Alright,I'm tired. I'm off now.
Take care!
D-Illusionist----x
['o5] Live life the fullest!
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠5:09:00 pm♠
Sunday, October 30, 2005
[ 30.10.05 ]
Love? Guys? Making Love? What's all these?
I was surfing the net this few days and I came across those articles. Yeah. Like Getting turned on. Stuff that makes people "happy". Errr...Stuff like that ya?
See no evil,hear no evil. =X
Anyway,what's there to hide? I mean we want to explore too. It isn't anything bad or something. It's just part of our lives. What can I say? Some people deny alot but who knows what kind of devil he or she is inside. Haha. Ok,let's not be so devilish already. Are you that *ahem* devil? =D La La LA. ^_^ <-- Innocent me. Bleah! I wonder what people think when people mention the word "sex". Yes,yes. Male or female but some think otherwise. Even if they do,it isn't really that bad actually but some people make it seems to be disgusting. Very disgusting that people take it as something pervertic to talk about. I mean it's the way you put it as. It's your point of view to either make it disgusting or otherwise. Anyway,I should not be talking about how to turn it "on". I should talk about staying safe. =) Well... I'm reading this article now. Well? You read on ya?
Don't give your trust away
In a perfect world we would all be governed by an innate desire to love and respect one another.
In that world, trust would be our default assumption. But in today's real and virtual and worlds, you must guard against trusting the untrustworthy and giving away your love under circumstances that could come back to haunt you. Exercise caution and proceed slowly. What do you really know about this person? How can you be sure? Any suitor must earn your trust gradually, through consistently honorable, forthright behavior.
Don't give it away for the asking -- and you will be asked. As an added precaution, consider setting up a secondary email account, to be used just for this relationship, which you can shut down should things seem not right.
Honor your hunches
We are intuitive people, yet we often dismiss intuition in favor of seemingly hard facts and logical explanations.
Trust yourself. Go with your instincts, even when they can't be logically explained. When something feels wrong, it generally is. When someone appears untrustworthy, they usually are. If you want to substantiate an intuitive hunch, hire a service to check on your suitor's background (criminal records, home ownership, bankruptcy, divorce, etc.). These services can be found on the Web or in your Yellow Pages under Investigators. While background information may reassure you about someone's history, it provides no guarantees about future behavior. Ask yourself why you are dating someone you feel the need to investigate.
Watch for red flags
The trained eye often easily spots the unscrupulous. They betray themselves with inconsistency and unexplainable behavior. You should be concerned if your date does any of the following without providing an acceptable explanation:
Frequently disappears and becomes unreachable by phone or email
Provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, and so on
Refuses to speak to you on the phone after establishing ongoing, online intimacy
Refuses to give you a home number and only calls you from work
Doesn't provide direct answers to direct questions
Appears in person to be significantly different from his or her online persona
Never introduces you to friends, professional associates or family members
Be responsible and trustworthy yourself
Some say that the lines between honesty, exaggeration and deception have blurred, especially in print personals and online dating. Is it a crime to represent yourself as a few years younger, especially when your friends frequently comment that you don't look your age? Has thinning hair become a euphemism for bald? If we want to hear the truth, we must start by telling the truth, even when it isn't easy or advantageous. And we must conduct ourselves and our romances in a responsible manner. Don't fall in love at the click of a mouse. Don't become prematurely intimate with someone, even if that intimacy only occurs online.
Live by standards of honesty and decency. Let the buck stop with you.
Yeah. That's about it. =)
*Yawns* 11.38PM now. Should I change phone again? Haha. Ok,I'll stop here for now.
Later!
Peace out.
D-Illusionist----x
Love? Guys? Making Love? What's all these?
I was surfing the net this few days and I came across those articles. Yeah. Like Getting turned on. Stuff that makes people "happy". Errr...Stuff like that ya?
See no evil,hear no evil. =X
Anyway,what's there to hide? I mean we want to explore too. It isn't anything bad or something. It's just part of our lives. What can I say? Some people deny alot but who knows what kind of devil he or she is inside. Haha. Ok,let's not be so devilish already. Are you that *ahem* devil? =D La La LA. ^_^ <-- Innocent me. Bleah! I wonder what people think when people mention the word "sex". Yes,yes. Male or female but some think otherwise. Even if they do,it isn't really that bad actually but some people make it seems to be disgusting. Very disgusting that people take it as something pervertic to talk about. I mean it's the way you put it as. It's your point of view to either make it disgusting or otherwise. Anyway,I should not be talking about how to turn it "on". I should talk about staying safe. =) Well... I'm reading this article now. Well? You read on ya?
Don't give your trust away
In a perfect world we would all be governed by an innate desire to love and respect one another.
In that world, trust would be our default assumption. But in today's real and virtual and worlds, you must guard against trusting the untrustworthy and giving away your love under circumstances that could come back to haunt you. Exercise caution and proceed slowly. What do you really know about this person? How can you be sure? Any suitor must earn your trust gradually, through consistently honorable, forthright behavior.
Don't give it away for the asking -- and you will be asked. As an added precaution, consider setting up a secondary email account, to be used just for this relationship, which you can shut down should things seem not right.
Honor your hunches
We are intuitive people, yet we often dismiss intuition in favor of seemingly hard facts and logical explanations.
Trust yourself. Go with your instincts, even when they can't be logically explained. When something feels wrong, it generally is. When someone appears untrustworthy, they usually are. If you want to substantiate an intuitive hunch, hire a service to check on your suitor's background (criminal records, home ownership, bankruptcy, divorce, etc.). These services can be found on the Web or in your Yellow Pages under Investigators. While background information may reassure you about someone's history, it provides no guarantees about future behavior. Ask yourself why you are dating someone you feel the need to investigate.
Watch for red flags
The trained eye often easily spots the unscrupulous. They betray themselves with inconsistency and unexplainable behavior. You should be concerned if your date does any of the following without providing an acceptable explanation:
Frequently disappears and becomes unreachable by phone or email
Provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, and so on
Refuses to speak to you on the phone after establishing ongoing, online intimacy
Refuses to give you a home number and only calls you from work
Doesn't provide direct answers to direct questions
Appears in person to be significantly different from his or her online persona
Never introduces you to friends, professional associates or family members
Be responsible and trustworthy yourself
Some say that the lines between honesty, exaggeration and deception have blurred, especially in print personals and online dating. Is it a crime to represent yourself as a few years younger, especially when your friends frequently comment that you don't look your age? Has thinning hair become a euphemism for bald? If we want to hear the truth, we must start by telling the truth, even when it isn't easy or advantageous. And we must conduct ourselves and our romances in a responsible manner. Don't fall in love at the click of a mouse. Don't become prematurely intimate with someone, even if that intimacy only occurs online.
Live by standards of honesty and decency. Let the buck stop with you.
Yeah. That's about it. =)
*Yawns* 11.38PM now. Should I change phone again? Haha. Ok,I'll stop here for now.
Later!
Peace out.
D-Illusionist----x
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠11:38:00 pm♠
Saturday, October 29, 2005
As I promise I'll write in seperately. Here I am writing it,yeah?
Anyway,yesterday was nothing much. Just cleaning the classrooms,stuff like that. Went out with my mother. She went to cut her hair at Jean Yip. I did something crazy. If I were to say it,I think you people think I'm crazy or something. Anyway,that's for you to find out! Haha. If you can ever guess! That I bet you'll never! =D
Oh well...
Hmm... Heard of this Japanese animation show called "Diamond Dust Drops"? It's quite a nice show. Don't know to some as some may think it's boring but to me it isn't.Oh whatever. Yeah.
Stories of six different young women living in various parts of Hokkaido as they deal with life’s challenges and the difficulties of romance all the while hoping to see the diamond dust.
So it's like one girl,two episodes.
Yesterday's episode was sweet. Aww... Everytime she falls asleep she'll be in her dream land. Oh oh oh!! If only dreams ever come true just like in the show. Her dream sort of really come true! Ain't it amazing? It's so sweet!
So it's like she keeps a record of her dreams in her dream journal. Anything she dreams about,she'll write it there. Then one day,she received this email from her "fan". Her fan is also at Hokkaido,Japan. ....................................................Ok,you go and find out the rest. Haha. Last to type it but it's really nice. You should watch. =)
Let me see what's next on my list?
Oh ya. You know Bon Jovi's new album? "Have A Nice Day"? Yeah. That album simply rocks! Wanna know why? Well,the songs in it are just nice. Catchy and easy listening. Though some compare it with their previous album "Bounce" and say it's the same. I disagree with it. I think this one rocks even more! Their hit single,"Have A Nice Day" simply rocks. One of my favourites. Some recommendations of songs from their "Have A Nice Day" album would be, "Last Man Standing", "Last Ciagarette", "Complicated", "Story of My Life", "Dirty Little Secret". Those are my favourites. Their really nice. Especially "Last Ciagarette". A catchy song. Nice.
I haven't bought their album. But I've listen to the samples. Aww... I'm missing all these?! How could this possibly be? Haha. Well? Soon I'll be getting it. I'm sure that I'm going to buy their album. But I'm not sure if I'll ever buy their collector's box album. "100,000,000 million fans can't be wrong". Yeah,that one. It cost about $88. Don't know about now. The price may be slightly cheaper. It contains 4CDs and 1DVD. All those songs aren't released. Even if they do,like for example "Last Man Standing". Their "Last Man Standing" on their "Have A Nice Day" album sounds way BETTER. Anyway,Bon Jovi rocks! =)
Ok. Now is 12.20PM. Saturday. Hmm? Oh... Going out with my family later. Tomorrow going out with my mother. Monday? Not too sure. Monday is Halloween. 31st October. Oh but in Singapore,we don't celebrate it. Maybe in America,yes.
Hey,I've to go now.
Got stuff to do.
Later!
D-Illusionist----x
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠12:21:00 pm♠
[ 29.10.05 ]
Woo-hoo! It's that period again! Holiday!! Schools' out! Holidays in! La La LA... Two months holidays! What am I gonna do? I only have Maths homework and yeah,that's it.
29 of October? Gosh... Haven't been updating my blog huh? Well... Few days ago I was writing an entry when all of a sudden I just couldn't open my eyes anymore. So I stopped and so that's no entry. So... Here I am with one at the moment. =D
Alright,I'll list the things I've done in the past week. =) Is that better? =D
I'll write yesterday's experience in a seperate one. Don't want to be confused.
But first... Let me recall when was the last time I blogged. Hmm? Oh ya! 17 of October. Ok then,I'll start from 18th.
-----[ 18.10.05 ]-----
It was my last paper! Elements of Office Administration [Practical] and Civics and Moral Education paper. It was quite an easy paper so I'm like quite relaxed. After the papers,I went home.
After that,went out to make my Identity Card (IC). Didn't expect to see a few of my primary school classmates. Guess what? I misplace or rather lost my Birth Certificate. Got make a replacement and it cost $30!! Can you believe it? Just a piece of paper cost $30. Guess I should learn from the mistake. NEVER TO LOSE ANYTHING ANYMORE. My parents were with me. So my father paid for it. Oh well... What can I say?
After that,went shopping. Went looking for my new year shoes! Haha... I'm a little flicker minded. Couldn't decide what to buy. In the end,I bought the shoes that I first set my eyes on when I was at Parco Bugis Junction. Didn't buy the one that I thought of getting at Charles & Keith.
-----[ 19.10.05 ]-----
Marking day!
Went out with Pearline. Went window-shopping with her at Bugis. Went to take neoprints with her. It was really fun. The last time I took neoprints with her was last year. New Year's Eve.
Went to National Library after that. Did some crazy stuff in the toliet. =D Oh... That's a secret. We went to the top floor of National Library but there was nothing there. So we went down. It was a little boring when we were there because we expected more but it didn't meet our expectations. So we left and went to Marina Square. Shop for a while then went home.
Took some pictures in the MRT. =D Spend lot of time with each other. Well? We did some catch up as we seldom see each other that often as we're always busy with our stuff. After all,it was really fun. At least,we spent some quality time when we have the time. =) If only it was more of it. =D
-----[ 20.10.05 ]------
It's after exams. What do you expect? As usual. Checking of answer scripts. Got back Computer Applications paper and English. Oh and not forgetting my worst nightmare,Mother Tongue paper. Err...? And also Elements of Office Administration. Darn! Was really disappointed with my English results.
Didn't do well in Paper 2. It's so wrong! Because normally I do well in Paper 2 and not in Paper 1 but this time it's the oppsite. Oh well? What can I say? After all,I passed but I wasn't happy with the marks.
Mother Tongue? What can I say? It ain't a big deal to me. No surprise. As usual,I failed. Darn it. I failed by 9 marks. =( Oh well...
Was really happy with my Computer Application marks. I got the highest. =D Was really glad. I was smiling like mad. You can see that BIG smile on my face but I keep telling myself enough. So I stopped. So no BIG smile already,just a little one.
When teacher was reading out the marks for Elements of Office Administration I was really nervous. Afraid that I won't do well. Well? It's not like my favourite subject or something but I'm sure that I'm able to do well. It's not like I'm over-confident or something. But I believe that I can. 72? I was shocked. I couldn't believe it. I expected at least 80 for Elements of Office Administration. Counted the marks. It was 82! So I told my teacher about it. She counted twice and yeah,82! What a relieve.
-----[ 21.10.05 ]-----
Got back Maths paper. I did pretty well for my Paper 1 but I didn't for my Paper 2. But I passed. =) Got back Science paper. Was pleased with it. I didn't study for Science. I still remember that day. I was so busy studying Maths that I forgot to study Science and when I have the time to study,it was only 5 minutes!! Thank goodness,the paper isn't really that difficult. It's a fair paper.
What can I say? It was a relaxing day. Nothing much actually.
...Went out in the afternoon with my mother.
-----[ 22.10.05 ]-----
Just chilling at home. It's Charlynne's Birthday. I texted her wishing her Happy Birthday via SMS. Was just surfing the net and doing stuff to chill myself.
-----[ 23.10.05 ]-----
Went out with my mother. Went shopping. Hari Raya is coming. What can I say? Shop shop shop!! =D
-----[ 24.10.05 ]-----
No school! Marking day!
-----[ 25.10.05 ]-----
Was in school. Went for a heritage tour at Chinatown. Got to know more about Chinatown and also about Chinese people. Hmm? Got to know more about my own kind. I mean "half" of my own. Haha...
-----[ 26.10.05 ]-----
Music enrichment program.
I learnt how to play the angkulung,malay kompang and learn a little bit of Indian dance. It was quite alright. Quite fun in a way but the Indian dance was a little embarrassing. I didn't know how to dance and the dance was sort of funny in a way but I learn a little at least. Oh well.........
-----[ 27.10.05 ]-----
Had some activities. It was a little boring but I wouldn't say very boring. It was ok.
Got back report book. Was really scared about it. I was hoping that I'll maintain my class position. Denley got 1st. 2nd was unknown. 3rd is Faris. 4th is Charlynne and 5th is Junxiang. You may be wondering why 2nd is unknown. Cause 2nd is also known as unknown. Haha... Ok,enough crap. Ok,I got 2nd.
I was really happy. But was still shaking. Yeah,the moment I got the result slip,I was shaking. Feeling very nervous. Didn't dare to look. So I put it aside first and continued with whatever I'm suppose to finish. [That is colouring] About a minute or two I then take a look at it. I was really nervous. I took a peek and when I saw 2/34. I finally dare to look at it. Though I got 2nd,my percentage is kind of miserable. 67.5 only. Oh well... I still have next year to improve even more and I will try my very best to improve. =) .............................
I guess I'll continue later. I'm really tired.
I better be going. My eyes are shutting already.
Alright,so long and goodnight!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
Woo-hoo! It's that period again! Holiday!! Schools' out! Holidays in! La La LA... Two months holidays! What am I gonna do? I only have Maths homework and yeah,that's it.
29 of October? Gosh... Haven't been updating my blog huh? Well... Few days ago I was writing an entry when all of a sudden I just couldn't open my eyes anymore. So I stopped and so that's no entry. So... Here I am with one at the moment. =D
Alright,I'll list the things I've done in the past week. =) Is that better? =D
I'll write yesterday's experience in a seperate one. Don't want to be confused.
But first... Let me recall when was the last time I blogged. Hmm? Oh ya! 17 of October. Ok then,I'll start from 18th.
-----[ 18.10.05 ]-----
It was my last paper! Elements of Office Administration [Practical] and Civics and Moral Education paper. It was quite an easy paper so I'm like quite relaxed. After the papers,I went home.
After that,went out to make my Identity Card (IC). Didn't expect to see a few of my primary school classmates. Guess what? I misplace or rather lost my Birth Certificate. Got make a replacement and it cost $30!! Can you believe it? Just a piece of paper cost $30. Guess I should learn from the mistake. NEVER TO LOSE ANYTHING ANYMORE. My parents were with me. So my father paid for it. Oh well... What can I say?
After that,went shopping. Went looking for my new year shoes! Haha... I'm a little flicker minded. Couldn't decide what to buy. In the end,I bought the shoes that I first set my eyes on when I was at Parco Bugis Junction. Didn't buy the one that I thought of getting at Charles & Keith.
-----[ 19.10.05 ]-----
Marking day!
Went out with Pearline. Went window-shopping with her at Bugis. Went to take neoprints with her. It was really fun. The last time I took neoprints with her was last year. New Year's Eve.
Went to National Library after that. Did some crazy stuff in the toliet. =D Oh... That's a secret. We went to the top floor of National Library but there was nothing there. So we went down. It was a little boring when we were there because we expected more but it didn't meet our expectations. So we left and went to Marina Square. Shop for a while then went home.
Took some pictures in the MRT. =D Spend lot of time with each other. Well? We did some catch up as we seldom see each other that often as we're always busy with our stuff. After all,it was really fun. At least,we spent some quality time when we have the time. =) If only it was more of it. =D
-----[ 20.10.05 ]------
It's after exams. What do you expect? As usual. Checking of answer scripts. Got back Computer Applications paper and English. Oh and not forgetting my worst nightmare,Mother Tongue paper. Err...? And also Elements of Office Administration. Darn! Was really disappointed with my English results.
Didn't do well in Paper 2. It's so wrong! Because normally I do well in Paper 2 and not in Paper 1 but this time it's the oppsite. Oh well? What can I say? After all,I passed but I wasn't happy with the marks.
Mother Tongue? What can I say? It ain't a big deal to me. No surprise. As usual,I failed. Darn it. I failed by 9 marks. =( Oh well...
Was really happy with my Computer Application marks. I got the highest. =D Was really glad. I was smiling like mad. You can see that BIG smile on my face but I keep telling myself enough. So I stopped. So no BIG smile already,just a little one.
When teacher was reading out the marks for Elements of Office Administration I was really nervous. Afraid that I won't do well. Well? It's not like my favourite subject or something but I'm sure that I'm able to do well. It's not like I'm over-confident or something. But I believe that I can. 72? I was shocked. I couldn't believe it. I expected at least 80 for Elements of Office Administration. Counted the marks. It was 82! So I told my teacher about it. She counted twice and yeah,82! What a relieve.
-----[ 21.10.05 ]-----
Got back Maths paper. I did pretty well for my Paper 1 but I didn't for my Paper 2. But I passed. =) Got back Science paper. Was pleased with it. I didn't study for Science. I still remember that day. I was so busy studying Maths that I forgot to study Science and when I have the time to study,it was only 5 minutes!! Thank goodness,the paper isn't really that difficult. It's a fair paper.
What can I say? It was a relaxing day. Nothing much actually.
...Went out in the afternoon with my mother.
-----[ 22.10.05 ]-----
Just chilling at home. It's Charlynne's Birthday. I texted her wishing her Happy Birthday via SMS. Was just surfing the net and doing stuff to chill myself.
-----[ 23.10.05 ]-----
Went out with my mother. Went shopping. Hari Raya is coming. What can I say? Shop shop shop!! =D
-----[ 24.10.05 ]-----
No school! Marking day!
-----[ 25.10.05 ]-----
Was in school. Went for a heritage tour at Chinatown. Got to know more about Chinatown and also about Chinese people. Hmm? Got to know more about my own kind. I mean "half" of my own. Haha...
-----[ 26.10.05 ]-----
Music enrichment program.
I learnt how to play the angkulung,malay kompang and learn a little bit of Indian dance. It was quite alright. Quite fun in a way but the Indian dance was a little embarrassing. I didn't know how to dance and the dance was sort of funny in a way but I learn a little at least. Oh well.........
-----[ 27.10.05 ]-----
Had some activities. It was a little boring but I wouldn't say very boring. It was ok.
Got back report book. Was really scared about it. I was hoping that I'll maintain my class position. Denley got 1st. 2nd was unknown. 3rd is Faris. 4th is Charlynne and 5th is Junxiang. You may be wondering why 2nd is unknown. Cause 2nd is also known as unknown. Haha... Ok,enough crap. Ok,I got 2nd.
I was really happy. But was still shaking. Yeah,the moment I got the result slip,I was shaking. Feeling very nervous. Didn't dare to look. So I put it aside first and continued with whatever I'm suppose to finish. [That is colouring] About a minute or two I then take a look at it. I was really nervous. I took a peek and when I saw 2/34. I finally dare to look at it. Though I got 2nd,my percentage is kind of miserable. 67.5 only. Oh well... I still have next year to improve even more and I will try my very best to improve. =) .............................
I guess I'll continue later. I'm really tired.
I better be going. My eyes are shutting already.
Alright,so long and goodnight!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠2:45:00 am♠
Monday, October 17, 2005
[ 17.10.05 ]
It's Monday! Nice. Guess what? It's exactly 12 midnight. Oh well... Got nothing much to do at the moment. Just surfing the internet. Wondering why I'm not sleeping? My paper starts at 10. So I can stay up a little later than usual but not too late. If too late,I'll be like a zombie. =D
Anyway,I've looking at love quotes at the moment. I find them interesting. Here's some loves quotes. So take your time and enjoy reading it!
+
+
+
Love is strong yet delicate. It can be broken. To truly love is to understand this.To be in love is to respect this.
- Stephen Packer -
You know you are in love when you see the world in her eyes,and her eyes everywhere in the world.
- David Levesque -
There is only one happiness in life,to love and be loved.
- George Sand -
Love is like a mustard seed;planted by God and watered by men
- Muda Saint Michael -
Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle.
- Crystal Middlemas -
When you love someone,all your saved-up wishes start coming out.
- Elizabeth Bowen -
We sat side by side in the morning light and looked out at the future together.
- Brian Andres -
Love is like a mountain,hard to climb,but once you get to the top the view is beautiful.
- Daniel Monroe Tuttle -
Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more it is willing to see less.
- Will Moss -
Love is like the sun coming out of the clouds and warming your soul.
- Author Unknown -
To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.
- Bill Wilson -
Love is smiling on the inside and out.
- Jennifer Williams -
Love is a moment that lasts forever...
- Julie Wittey -
Love isn't blind; it just only sees what matters.
- William Curry -
Love that is true never grows old.
- Elben Bano -
Love reminds you that nothing else matters.
- Amy Bushell -
A Friend's Love says: "If you ever need anything,I'll be there."
True Love says: "You'll never need anything;I'll be there."
- Jimi Hollemans -
Love is a decision
not an emotion or feeling,
that if made from the heart will outlast anything...
- Raul and Samantha Juarez -
Love is more than a feeling;it's a state of mind.
- Lisa Grude -
Love is like a blazing flame,golden and full of warmth.
- Ben Oliver -
Love is like a piece of art work,even the smallest bit can be so beautiful.
- Stacie Cunningham -
Hmm... Let me try mine now. =D
Love is universal,
Love is strong
Love is everything...
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love needs patience,love needs care and concern.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
The power of love is stronger than anything else.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love is special. To be loved is a gift but to love is something precious.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
If love is a crime,what would crime be?
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
It takes two to become one. When two unites,it'll become one heart. A heart that says "Be with me forever."
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love isn't evil. It's the people that makes love evil. Love is universal.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Hmm...? Oh well... That's all I can think of for now.
That's it for this entry.
Later!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
['o5] Be true to yourself and everyone else.
It's Monday! Nice. Guess what? It's exactly 12 midnight. Oh well... Got nothing much to do at the moment. Just surfing the internet. Wondering why I'm not sleeping? My paper starts at 10. So I can stay up a little later than usual but not too late. If too late,I'll be like a zombie. =D
Anyway,I've looking at love quotes at the moment. I find them interesting. Here's some loves quotes. So take your time and enjoy reading it!
+
+
+
Love is strong yet delicate. It can be broken. To truly love is to understand this.To be in love is to respect this.
- Stephen Packer -
You know you are in love when you see the world in her eyes,and her eyes everywhere in the world.
- David Levesque -
There is only one happiness in life,to love and be loved.
- George Sand -
Love is like a mustard seed;planted by God and watered by men
- Muda Saint Michael -
Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle.
- Crystal Middlemas -
When you love someone,all your saved-up wishes start coming out.
- Elizabeth Bowen -
We sat side by side in the morning light and looked out at the future together.
- Brian Andres -
Love is like a mountain,hard to climb,but once you get to the top the view is beautiful.
- Daniel Monroe Tuttle -
Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more it is willing to see less.
- Will Moss -
Love is like the sun coming out of the clouds and warming your soul.
- Author Unknown -
To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.
- Bill Wilson -
Love is smiling on the inside and out.
- Jennifer Williams -
Love is a moment that lasts forever...
- Julie Wittey -
Love isn't blind; it just only sees what matters.
- William Curry -
Love that is true never grows old.
- Elben Bano -
Love reminds you that nothing else matters.
- Amy Bushell -
A Friend's Love says: "If you ever need anything,I'll be there."
True Love says: "You'll never need anything;I'll be there."
- Jimi Hollemans -
Love is a decision
not an emotion or feeling,
that if made from the heart will outlast anything...
- Raul and Samantha Juarez -
Love is more than a feeling;it's a state of mind.
- Lisa Grude -
Love is like a blazing flame,golden and full of warmth.
- Ben Oliver -
Love is like a piece of art work,even the smallest bit can be so beautiful.
- Stacie Cunningham -
Hmm... Let me try mine now. =D
Love is universal,
Love is strong
Love is everything...
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love needs patience,love needs care and concern.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
The power of love is stronger than anything else.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love is special. To be loved is a gift but to love is something precious.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
If love is a crime,what would crime be?
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
It takes two to become one. When two unites,it'll become one heart. A heart that says "Be with me forever."
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Love isn't evil. It's the people that makes love evil. Love is universal.
- D-Illusionist // Diane -
Hmm...? Oh well... That's all I can think of for now.
That's it for this entry.
Later!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
['o5] Be true to yourself and everyone else.
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠12:47:00 am♠
Sunday, October 16, 2005
[ 16.10.05 ]
I'm still awake. I wanted to sleep about an hour ago (1AM) but I didn't feel like it. I am tired actually but I just couldn't. I don't know why. So I decided to switch on the computer again and hopefully I'll go to bed but I guess I still couldn't so I decided to blog. So... Here I am!
I'm just surfing the net now. Nothing much. Don't feel like chatting but feel like reading so I surf the net to read about articles. The articles are very interesting. It just catches my attention. Making me want to know more about it and so on. I've been like surfing the whole day and not chatting. I just don't feel like chatting today. Oh... I mean yesterday. It's Sunday already! Early morning. =D
So many interesting stuff to read on the internet. Ain't the internet a good thing? It's the best! You can find out more about stuff that you want to know. Like they say "Curiousity kills a cat" or whatever it is. Is that how the quote is or what? I somewhat have forgotten how it goes. Ok,moving on now.
Anyway,I'm reading about love now. I wonder how true is this. Well... You decide. Read on.
.
.
.
Love does not hurt. Physical and/or emotional abuse are not a part of love.
Love is not manipulative, it should not be used to get others to do what you want. You should never give in to demands based on the, "You would do it if you loved me!" tactic.
Love is an intense feeling of caring for another person. It can take many different forms (romantic, friendly, familial) but it is always about caring.
Although it is true that a big part of love is putting another person's happiness ahead of your own this never includes compromising your values or being untrue to yourself.
If somebody asks you to do something that you don't want to do in order to "prove" your love they do not love you the way you might think they do. When you love another person you don't ask them to sacrifice a part of themselves in the name of that love.
It is very easy to confuse lust for love. The true measure of romantic love is commitment and trust not physical attraction.
It is possible to feel romantic love for more than one person at a given time. Just think, if it is possible for you to love both of your parents at the same time why would it be impossible to feel romantic love for two people at once? Don't beat yourself up emotionally if you find yourself in this unhappy situation. But be sure to remain single and be open and honest with all parties about your feelings and confusion.
Sex is NOT love. Love is NOT sex. Sex can be a part of romantic love but it is never mandatory.
Romantic love can (and often does) fade. When it goes there is not always a reason. When somebody falls out of love with you it does not reflect upon your value as a person or your desirability.
Love should make you feel happy, secure and appreciated.
Do you agree with all of the above?
Hmm... I somewhat totally agree with it but some I'm just not too sure.
I wonder if there's true love? Is there? If only life is that simple like the ones you see in the movies. You know that kind of happy ending one. Yeah. If only it was. But you know what? Dream on! This is reality. It's totally different from the ones you see in the movies. I wish I could have that. (If only) But oh well... Thinking of guys just makes me sick. I mean talking about them for example "his cute","his hot"... you know those kind of comments? Well,I still have to admit that I'm still the same old me but I'm not really interested in them for now. I just don't have that feeling that I usually do. I don't have anyone on my mind currently. Well? I guess so.
Hmm...? On second thought. I feel it isn't right if I say that. Well? Yes,I don't really have any feelings towards anyone but... Alright,to be honest,at times I think of him. Yes I know it's crazy. It's really really RIDICULOUS. All of my friends have been telling me his not worth it,his this and that... Friends are always telling me to move on and not think about him. Yes I know that too. I know I have to move on and pretend that nothing happen. I did move on but at times,I still think of him. I just can't seem to totally get rid of that. For all the others that I've like before,it isn't that bad. Even though I know I once said to some friends that I'll never ever forget that "boy" then. I even said to them I'll like him forever... Guess that forever is "not" forever. It's just that at that time I just couldn't help myself. I was so totally into him and I'm like making a fool out of myself. Thinking that his the longest one that I've ever like. Well? No. He isn't. It's only about two years only. Well? Not really exactly two years. About two years only.
I know I may sound as if I'm like a player to some but I'm not. Sometimes I just can have the same feeling at one go and I don't even know why. Yes,back then I was attracted by looks maybe. But as I grow older and wiser,I look more into the person's personality and stuff like that. I have to admit that I used to like a lot of guys. This I can never deny cause my friends know that too. But it seems that no matter who I like,I'll always go back to square one. And that's him. No matter what I do,I'll always think of him. Darn,wish everything didn't happen. How I wish I didn't develope any feelings towards him. I just can't help it. Darn it! =(
I just feel happy whenever I talk to him. I feel like I have peace when I talk to him. I get excited for no reason as when he goes online or whenever his around. All my worries were like put aside for a moment. I feel somewhat secure when I talk to him. Yes,yes... I know it's crazy. I don't know him that [very] well yet I spill the beans. It was an honest mistake. I seriously didn't have that brain to be able to think. I was such an idiot I'd say. Back then,I just didn't take things seriously. I've made alot of mistakes. I'm no holy person nor innocent. I'm just an ordinary human who makes mistakes and I really regret it alot. I wish all this didn't happen. If only I could turn back time... Well? No point crying over a spilled milk. What's done,can't be undone.
As for now... I try to learn from my mistakes. I'm not perfect and I can't be perfect because nobody is perfect. But the least I could do is to learn from my mistakes and be a better person. I don't ever want the past to repeat again. Thinking about those sour memories it just hurts me. Not only does it hurts,it leaves a scar behind too. And I'll be like... "I shouldn't have done it"... You know stuff like that. Most people always say I'm like always so cheerful,so happy... Couldn't be bothered with stuff,blah blah... I even once had this comment by someone... "Diane,you seem to be so carefree. You're like so pampered." I guess you're wrong. Me? Carefree? Gotta be kidding. Me? Pampered? You just don't know me. Maybe I seem to be carefree but nobody can tell how I actually feel. Do you know my inner feelings? Can you read them? You will never understand how I feel. You may think I'm crazy or over-reacting. Guess you're not really that right. I mean,I don't go against people's opinion. After all,it's just an opinion. You,yourself know if it's right or wrong.
Do you think I like to be like this? There's just so many things and sometimes I maybe whatever you call it or whatever you interpret me as. I don't really care. Well? It somewhat hurts if I hear some cruel or harsh comments about me and I keep wondering where did I go wrong. I too have my softer side. It's not like I don't have it's that you don't see it. It's all hidden. So I think I know why some say I'm the carefree type. Is it because I don't show my softer side? Yeah,ditto! I think that's the reason. I know sometimes like when I hear those comments and people tell me I'll mostly react "whatever!" but do you know how I actually feel within? Behind that smile there's tears hiding behind. Behind that joy,there's sadness. Behind that I don't care look,there's that curious look. I may seem to be those rough type but it's just a cover. People think otherwise about me. Some maybe positive and some maybe negative. Yes,I'm talkative. I talk alot,I express myself..... I maybe a little short-tempered at times and impatient. Crappy? What have you. But I can be a listener if you need someone to talk to because I am always willing to listen to anyone. I will try to help if it's possible. We can crap around and laugh like mad. Well? That's what I'd love to do again. I miss those days. I don't think I'm that unreasonable because I know I'm not. I'm quite a fair person,I don't just accuse people for no reason. That's so wrong. I just love to have fun and be happy-go-lucky if possible.
What can I say? Life's like that. Just live with it to the fullest and try not to take those comments too seriously. =)
I'm still thinking of him. Though I don't have that feeling that I used to have. That very STRONG feeling. But it makes me happy to see him. Despite people telling me about those stuff. You know those "he said" stuff. I don't know why I still care for him. What am I? Crazy? I don't understand why I care for him. Even seeing him in the morning makes me happy. Seeing him happy makes me happy too. Hearing him achieving something makes me happy too. I hope his doing well. Well? I'm sure he will. I just hope he doesn't mix with those bad companies. I really hope that his fine and does well in whatever he does. He may think I'm this and that but whatever it is,his something to me. Well? It's not as if I still like him or something. Oh... Do I still..........? Nah... I don't think so. I don't like anyone currently yet I still care for him. Oh well... Don't think about guys already. =)
Gosh... It's 3.16AM! You mean,I've been typing for very long? Haha... Now then I realise. Expressing how I feel,I feel much better. All this is all right from the bottom of my heart. It's very pure and that's how I really feel at the moment. Feel free to comment! Tag me ok? =)
*Yawns* I'm off to bed now.
Have a good day ahead!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
['o5] "Trust your heart,follow your dreams"
I'm still awake. I wanted to sleep about an hour ago (1AM) but I didn't feel like it. I am tired actually but I just couldn't. I don't know why. So I decided to switch on the computer again and hopefully I'll go to bed but I guess I still couldn't so I decided to blog. So... Here I am!
I'm just surfing the net now. Nothing much. Don't feel like chatting but feel like reading so I surf the net to read about articles. The articles are very interesting. It just catches my attention. Making me want to know more about it and so on. I've been like surfing the whole day and not chatting. I just don't feel like chatting today. Oh... I mean yesterday. It's Sunday already! Early morning. =D
So many interesting stuff to read on the internet. Ain't the internet a good thing? It's the best! You can find out more about stuff that you want to know. Like they say "Curiousity kills a cat" or whatever it is. Is that how the quote is or what? I somewhat have forgotten how it goes. Ok,moving on now.
Anyway,I'm reading about love now. I wonder how true is this. Well... You decide. Read on.
.
.
.
Love does not hurt. Physical and/or emotional abuse are not a part of love.
Love is not manipulative, it should not be used to get others to do what you want. You should never give in to demands based on the, "You would do it if you loved me!" tactic.
Love is an intense feeling of caring for another person. It can take many different forms (romantic, friendly, familial) but it is always about caring.
Although it is true that a big part of love is putting another person's happiness ahead of your own this never includes compromising your values or being untrue to yourself.
If somebody asks you to do something that you don't want to do in order to "prove" your love they do not love you the way you might think they do. When you love another person you don't ask them to sacrifice a part of themselves in the name of that love.
It is very easy to confuse lust for love. The true measure of romantic love is commitment and trust not physical attraction.
It is possible to feel romantic love for more than one person at a given time. Just think, if it is possible for you to love both of your parents at the same time why would it be impossible to feel romantic love for two people at once? Don't beat yourself up emotionally if you find yourself in this unhappy situation. But be sure to remain single and be open and honest with all parties about your feelings and confusion.
Sex is NOT love. Love is NOT sex. Sex can be a part of romantic love but it is never mandatory.
Romantic love can (and often does) fade. When it goes there is not always a reason. When somebody falls out of love with you it does not reflect upon your value as a person or your desirability.
Love should make you feel happy, secure and appreciated.
Do you agree with all of the above?
Hmm... I somewhat totally agree with it but some I'm just not too sure.
I wonder if there's true love? Is there? If only life is that simple like the ones you see in the movies. You know that kind of happy ending one. Yeah. If only it was. But you know what? Dream on! This is reality. It's totally different from the ones you see in the movies. I wish I could have that. (If only) But oh well... Thinking of guys just makes me sick. I mean talking about them for example "his cute","his hot"... you know those kind of comments? Well,I still have to admit that I'm still the same old me but I'm not really interested in them for now. I just don't have that feeling that I usually do. I don't have anyone on my mind currently. Well? I guess so.
Hmm...? On second thought. I feel it isn't right if I say that. Well? Yes,I don't really have any feelings towards anyone but... Alright,to be honest,at times I think of him. Yes I know it's crazy. It's really really RIDICULOUS. All of my friends have been telling me his not worth it,his this and that... Friends are always telling me to move on and not think about him. Yes I know that too. I know I have to move on and pretend that nothing happen. I did move on but at times,I still think of him. I just can't seem to totally get rid of that. For all the others that I've like before,it isn't that bad. Even though I know I once said to some friends that I'll never ever forget that "boy" then. I even said to them I'll like him forever... Guess that forever is "not" forever. It's just that at that time I just couldn't help myself. I was so totally into him and I'm like making a fool out of myself. Thinking that his the longest one that I've ever like. Well? No. He isn't. It's only about two years only. Well? Not really exactly two years. About two years only.
I know I may sound as if I'm like a player to some but I'm not. Sometimes I just can have the same feeling at one go and I don't even know why. Yes,back then I was attracted by looks maybe. But as I grow older and wiser,I look more into the person's personality and stuff like that. I have to admit that I used to like a lot of guys. This I can never deny cause my friends know that too. But it seems that no matter who I like,I'll always go back to square one. And that's him. No matter what I do,I'll always think of him. Darn,wish everything didn't happen. How I wish I didn't develope any feelings towards him. I just can't help it. Darn it! =(
I just feel happy whenever I talk to him. I feel like I have peace when I talk to him. I get excited for no reason as when he goes online or whenever his around. All my worries were like put aside for a moment. I feel somewhat secure when I talk to him. Yes,yes... I know it's crazy. I don't know him that [very] well yet I spill the beans. It was an honest mistake. I seriously didn't have that brain to be able to think. I was such an idiot I'd say. Back then,I just didn't take things seriously. I've made alot of mistakes. I'm no holy person nor innocent. I'm just an ordinary human who makes mistakes and I really regret it alot. I wish all this didn't happen. If only I could turn back time... Well? No point crying over a spilled milk. What's done,can't be undone.
As for now... I try to learn from my mistakes. I'm not perfect and I can't be perfect because nobody is perfect. But the least I could do is to learn from my mistakes and be a better person. I don't ever want the past to repeat again. Thinking about those sour memories it just hurts me. Not only does it hurts,it leaves a scar behind too. And I'll be like... "I shouldn't have done it"... You know stuff like that. Most people always say I'm like always so cheerful,so happy... Couldn't be bothered with stuff,blah blah... I even once had this comment by someone... "Diane,you seem to be so carefree. You're like so pampered." I guess you're wrong. Me? Carefree? Gotta be kidding. Me? Pampered? You just don't know me. Maybe I seem to be carefree but nobody can tell how I actually feel. Do you know my inner feelings? Can you read them? You will never understand how I feel. You may think I'm crazy or over-reacting. Guess you're not really that right. I mean,I don't go against people's opinion. After all,it's just an opinion. You,yourself know if it's right or wrong.
Do you think I like to be like this? There's just so many things and sometimes I maybe whatever you call it or whatever you interpret me as. I don't really care. Well? It somewhat hurts if I hear some cruel or harsh comments about me and I keep wondering where did I go wrong. I too have my softer side. It's not like I don't have it's that you don't see it. It's all hidden. So I think I know why some say I'm the carefree type. Is it because I don't show my softer side? Yeah,ditto! I think that's the reason. I know sometimes like when I hear those comments and people tell me I'll mostly react "whatever!" but do you know how I actually feel within? Behind that smile there's tears hiding behind. Behind that joy,there's sadness. Behind that I don't care look,there's that curious look. I may seem to be those rough type but it's just a cover. People think otherwise about me. Some maybe positive and some maybe negative. Yes,I'm talkative. I talk alot,I express myself..... I maybe a little short-tempered at times and impatient. Crappy? What have you. But I can be a listener if you need someone to talk to because I am always willing to listen to anyone. I will try to help if it's possible. We can crap around and laugh like mad. Well? That's what I'd love to do again. I miss those days. I don't think I'm that unreasonable because I know I'm not. I'm quite a fair person,I don't just accuse people for no reason. That's so wrong. I just love to have fun and be happy-go-lucky if possible.
What can I say? Life's like that. Just live with it to the fullest and try not to take those comments too seriously. =)
I'm still thinking of him. Though I don't have that feeling that I used to have. That very STRONG feeling. But it makes me happy to see him. Despite people telling me about those stuff. You know those "he said" stuff. I don't know why I still care for him. What am I? Crazy? I don't understand why I care for him. Even seeing him in the morning makes me happy. Seeing him happy makes me happy too. Hearing him achieving something makes me happy too. I hope his doing well. Well? I'm sure he will. I just hope he doesn't mix with those bad companies. I really hope that his fine and does well in whatever he does. He may think I'm this and that but whatever it is,his something to me. Well? It's not as if I still like him or something. Oh... Do I still..........? Nah... I don't think so. I don't like anyone currently yet I still care for him. Oh well... Don't think about guys already. =)
Gosh... It's 3.16AM! You mean,I've been typing for very long? Haha... Now then I realise. Expressing how I feel,I feel much better. All this is all right from the bottom of my heart. It's very pure and that's how I really feel at the moment. Feel free to comment! Tag me ok? =)
*Yawns* I'm off to bed now.
Have a good day ahead!
D-Illusionist // Diane----x
['o5] "Trust your heart,follow your dreams"
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠3:16:00 am♠
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Today I'm 15 years and 11 days old. Three more days till I can officially party. I'm can actually party now but no. Not so soon. Wait till the last day of my last paper which will be on the 18th of October. My practical paper for Elements of Office Administration (E.O.A) and Civics & Moral Education (CME). Even CME have examinations. Cool.
Anyway,yesterday's paper was Maths (Paper 2) and Computer Applications (Practical). CPA was quite simple but not for Maths paper 2. It was soooo TOUGH! Compared to paper 1,paper 1 wasn't that tough. It was..... Err...? Well? Quite ok. Much easier than paper 2. Paper 2 was like hell for me. I lost 10 marks cause I didn't know how to do or didn't have that precious time to do. I think I'll fail for that paper. I'm sure I can at least get 10 marks or maybe even more but more? I don't think so. It's like I only know some while the rest....... Oh god. I couldn't think straight! My mind went blank. Hopefully I'll pass my Maths. I passed my paper 1 and I knew I could pass my paper 1 as it wasn't that difficult. It was somewhat a fair paper I'd say.
Oh well... I'm very worried for my English paper. I scared I didn't do well. =( I really hope I'll do well. Not just well but VERY. =D Hmm...? But I think as for now a well is alright cause the paper was somewhat tough which I didn't expect it to be. It wasn't the way I expected. It was beyond my expectations. Paper 1 was ok. Fair paper. Paper 2,the first two pages are killing me! By the looks of it,it was freaking me out already. I was petrified by it. As I go along doing the paper,it slowly calm me a little. In other words,the first few pages and the map is tough. The form filling was easy.
Science paper? I didn't really study! I didn't have the time to even study! =( How horrible? I only got to study a little bit only and that was only like 10 minutes! I think I'm able to pass the paper but I'm afraid that I won't do well. It's out of 60. Quite simple to get at least a 30 but I want to do well! I look at the multiple choice questions. It isn't that difficult at all but there were a few questions I wasn't so sure of the answer! That's the horrible part cause I forgot what's the answer to it! But I guess... Somehow,I may get it right. =D "may"...
Let me see... What other papers? Hmm...
Oh... Computer Application (Theory) it was ok. I wouldn't say it's a tough paper nor very easy paper. It was ok. It ain't that bad. Elements of Office Administration paper was alright. A fair paper. Mother Tongue paper? I think I'll just have to forget about it. I couldn't even be bothered but it seems to be easy but I don't think I'll be able to pass. Oh well.......
Finally the pressure is almost over. Just a few light ones to go. Oh! But I have to take my Elements of Office Administration very serious. Though it isn't my favourite subject but I know I'm capable of doing well and I mustn't go down. Well? At least maintain my standard. =D
After all this,I have one more worry. The worry of my results! I somewhat have this feeling of looking forward to get back my results but no! I'm afraid! Can anybody save me if I fall? Because if I fall,I may fall badly and injured myself and that hurts alot. Ouch! I may not fall,I may be shining as usual but I'm still afraid to know the truth? Maybe I am.
Speaking of hurt. I now realise that this year I've been hurt for like four times? I think that's why I stop thinking of guys. It just hurts me. It's a pain in the ass. Guys are always thinking that their so powerful and stuff like that. I can't stand guys who are so ego. Especially the ones that always listen to his friends and not himself. Ugh! That's the worst! He has no brains of his own! Ha! And yet thinking so highly of himself? Sheesh... I can't believe that some guys can be a moron. I mean come on... Who cares about what people say? As long as you,yourself like it the way you want it to be then that's fine. Don't always listen to others! You aren't even thinking! Listen to your heart and trust your heart. Don't just listen to others then oh,the next thing you forget about that person because of what your friends say. Isn't it dumb? I think it's VERY.
Oh well...
I feel that guys should be more on their own. I mean,don't always hear what people say or listen to what people say. Go along with your decisions and make your own. You have brains! You can think! So...? Are you going to have the brains but not use it or make your brains work? No point having a brain but not using it. Soon you'll be brain-dead. Such a pity huh? What can I say? Some people are just like that. I'm not only talking about guys. Alright. To be fair,I feel that some girls too. They deserve a knock on their head. They really aren't using their brains to think. They just listen to what people say and go along with the crowd and do whatever they do. Copy,copy,copy. That's all they know. Ha! Copycats. What can I say about them? Oh... Brainless? Maybe. Hate me if ya wanna. I don't owe anyone a living so mind you and stop being so idiotic like making such comments. I mean,have you ever ask yourself this question? If you make such comments about people,what about yourself. Are you that good?
Oh like what the hell.
*Yawns* Think about it before spilling it all.
I'm sick and tired of all this people.
D-Illusionist----x
[Make sure you use your brain!]
+*Interesting blog to read: http://xiaxue.blogspot.com -check it out when you're free!-*+
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠11:49:00 pm♠
Monday, October 10, 2005
I guess I've calm a little but whatever it is,I still don't wish to talk to him yet. Oh... whatever! Don't want to think about it. I think for now,I should treat him as invisible. That sounds like a good idea!
Oh well...
I think the reason why I've calm down is because of the music? I think so. Was listening to Blink-182 and as for now... Listening to Ronan Keating's songs. Studying for my Elements of Office Administration tomorrow. Next week's the practical paper. Pretty fast huh? And that will be my last paper. Errr...? Well? Ok,second last paper. My last paper is CME.
Today's Computer Application (CPA) paper was ok. I finish one second before time. Just as I finish writing the last answer,the teacher was like... "Pens down............" Last year I didn't get to finish my last page. What a waste. At least this year I get to finish it. I hope tomorrow's paper won't be that difficult. It's freaking me out already cause my E.O.A teacher said that it's gonna be a tough one. Hmm...? I wonder.
Alright... Better be concentrating now.
I'm off now...
+*D-Illusionist*+
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠10:55:00 pm♠
Stupid! I hate you! Spoil my bloody mood? What the hell is this? I was about to write nice things then this idiot spoil everything. You ruined everything! I HATE YOU!
I'm so angry now. I wasn't five minutes ago. THANKS to THAT SICK BROTHER OF MINE. I hate you!! I'm so mad at him. Always show attitude towards me? Ha! Stupid boy. Little kiddy don't act like big boy. You don't know what's the world like cause there are so many types of people and you wanna act BIG?!? Ha! Hello! Wrong world!
Oh god... Why are there tears flowing down my cheeks? Tears of anger? Haven't had tears of anger for quite some time already. I hate it cause that's when I get angry or I hate someone very deep.
Oh well... I really hope I'll calm down.
*&^%$@%
Oh like whatever...
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠10:33:00 pm♠
Saturday, October 08, 2005
What a wonderful day. Haha... Went out to study with Angie (Xiaoqiang) then took neoprints. We went to the library at Tampines. We didn't expect to see people from my school. Not just one or two but a number of them. Interesting huh? Or is it coincidence? Ha!
Oh well... What can I say? Everytime I go out I'll at least see one or two people I know or sometimes even more. Cool yeah? =) Was at the library studying and at the same time talk crap. After crapping we went to Tampines Mall to take neoprints. It was fun posing. I enjoy it but definately we're not posers. Don' t get the wrong idea it was just for that time only. =D Lovely pictures I'll say. Finally got a picture with Angie. How nice. We took the sticker type. I love the sticker type. We get to pose a lot of time and pick the best one. Unlike the cards one,we can't get to pose that much. Oh wait. I mean we can't get to take lots of shot. Maybe the holidays we'll take another one but I think the next one will be the card one. Well? At least one will do. I prefer the sticker type.
I had so much fun today. Just feel so relax. What can I say about today? All I can is to say it's a wonderful day.
After taking neoprint we went down to the basement to buy food. As you know it's the fasting month I can't eat cause I'm fasting. Anyway,it was Angie who buys food,not me. I just accompany her. After that we went home. She took bus while I took I took the MRT home.
One of the memorable day if only we get to hang out more often. Let's say? Every weekend? Haha... That would be nice.
Oh well...
I've to go now.
D-Illusionist
signin' off----x
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠9:17:00 pm♠
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Happy Birthday to me! Yeehaw! I'm finally 15 years old. =D Thanks for everything! You people just rock! You make my day!
Yes,you! You make my day! Weeeeee~ I feel so happy today. Not only happy,I guess I'm crazy! All those laughing,those crapping around with friends... Those nonsense. Boy,it was fun! Thanks for the gifts too! I'm so touched that you remember!
Thank you. I really appreciate those gifts. Angie's [Xiaoqiang] gift is just so cute that I'm like so in love with it. =D ......Aida's gift is hanging now. Haha...Her's is adorable. Pearline gave me an early birthday gift. That is about 3 days ago. Her's is lovely. Oh well... All I gotta say is THANK YOU SO MUCH! Whatever it is... Be it wishes or gifts,their all appreciated. I treasure everything. Like what they say... Gifts or not. Sincerity is the most important thing. =)
If only today will last forever. How interesting.
I really had a lot of fun today. Especially with Angie. I'll never forget this day. It was soooooo smooth flowing. =)
Hmm...
Ok,I think I'll end here for now.
KeEp It ReAL!
D-Illusionist----x
['o5 // d14nE]
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠6:59:00 pm♠
Monday, October 03, 2005
Hey!
Hmm... So fast 3rd of October. Can anyone guess what day is it tomorrow? ...It's my birthday! Just one more day! Pretty fast? Oh well,time flies very fast. For all you know it's the end of the year. It's already October. Two months left before it's the end of the year.
Oh dear. I'll be taking N levels next year. I now then realise that this year flies so fast. Everything happened too quick? I guess so. Too little time? Or is it that I hadn't been realising it? Hmm...?
I've just changed my blog layout. I kinda like it. This time,my blogskin feels more ME. I did whatever I could and finally my tagboard is up! =) Tag me! Tag me! Ok?
Four days left before examinations. My,my,my... I wonder how it's gonna be like. I haven't even started revising! I guess I'll have to start really soon. Maybe on Wednesday I'll start. No,what am I talking? I must I mean. My results aren't good for my common test the other time and I'm really disappointed. I did better for my mid-years and I expected my common test to be even much more better but I guess I was a little too over-confident. Oh well,I have to really work hard for now. I don't want anymore things to slip out of my way. I want things to be in control. The only way I can keep it in control is to do well. That way,I can have it my way.
Heard of expect the unexpected?, Anything's possible?, In any situation,there's always a solution? I'm sure you did. For those of you who have never heard of it,now you've heard it.
Oh well...
I'm off now...
D-Illusionist-----x ['o5]
[Have A Nice Day]
♥Ashley Kid♥ × ♠10:45:00 pm♠
// D: Illusionist
// What's your love type
// Are you too picky when it comes to men?
// What kind of sexy girl are you?
// What kind of girl are you?
// Are you spoiled?
// What flavour Pocky are you?
// Could you be violent?
// Speed test
95 words
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+ Diane
+ Anne, Ashley Kid, Silencer-D, D-Illusionist
+ 0ctober 4th 1990
+ Libra
+ Single and swinging, not looking - Likes making new friends
+ Mixed
(Chinese, Malay, Peranakan, Indonesian)
+ Park View Primary School (1997 - 2002)
+ Hai Sing Catholic School (2003 - 2006)
+ ITE College East (Info-Comm Technology; 2007 - 2008)
+ Currently: Singapore Polytechnic (Digital Media)
BLUE IS THE COLOUR
// What does your sleeping position says about you?
What Your Sleeping Position Says
Friends consider you to be kind, caring, and truly loyal.
You are easy going and trusting. However, you are too sensible to fall for mind games.
Open to the world, you are not afraid to be yourself.
If you don't get enough sleep, you are: Able to cope
It's hard to sleep next to you because: You're a bed hog
// What's your love type
| Your Love Type: ISFJ |
 In love, you are quietly intense, devoted, and tend too hold on too long. For you, sex is a way to get closer - and a way to take care of your partner. Overall, you are altruistic and eager to please your sweetie. However, you tend to also be non-confrontational and secretly frustrated with relationship issues. Best matches: ESTP or ESFP |
// Are you too picky when it comes to men?
| You Are Picky When it Counts |
 But you're also willing to put up with a few flaws in your Mr. Right You should congratulate yourself on having a realistic approach to dating. You probably have quite a few great guys you can date! |
// What kind of sexy girl are you?
| You Are Fun Sexy |
 Guys always have a great time with you, and that alone is sexy. You've got an upbeat, optimistic spirit that totally shines through. Any guy would be crazy to turn you down! |
// What kind of girl are you?
| You are a Brainy Girl! |
 You know a little bit about everything, and you're always dying to know more. For a guy to win your heart, he's got to share some of your intellectual interests. A awesome book collection of his own doesn't hurt either! |
// Are you spoiled?
| You Are 24% Spoiled |
 You appreciate each gift you're given - and you don't dwell on what you "deserve" to have. |
// What flavour Pocky are you?
| You Are Flan Pocky |
 East meets west... sweet meets salty. You're a pro at bringing unusual combos together! |
// Could you be violent?
| There's a Chance You Could Be Violent |
 Sometimes your anger gets the best of you, and end up regretting how you act. Try to curb your temper more often. It only has to get out of control once to do some damage. |
// Speed test
95 words
// —The Voice Within—
// Other Illusionist♠
Special links:
CeMTA (Drama) Blog
Ms Angeline
Class Blog - 1A/03 ['o9]
Meet The Illusi♠nist:
Adib
Aiba
Aidyl
Amelia
Andrew
Atiiyah
Azizah
————
Berwin
Belson
————
Chloe
Clara
————
Darlene*♦
Dickson (Snoopy)
Donn
————
Elvis
Eugene
————
Faezzah
Faezzah [2]
Faiz
Faizal (Bear)
Fiqah♦
Fyeqa
————
Gabriel
Gary's Lover Den
Gillian
Gladys
Grace
Guan Ting (GT)
Guo Wei
————
Hafiz Y.
Haziyah
————
Irsyad
————
Jaclyn♦
Jamie
Jason
Jia Hao
Jiekie
Jian Sheng
Jiayi
Jun Rong (JR)
————
Ken
————
Lee Ying
Leon
————
Marcus
————
Naqiah*
————
Pearline♦
Pei Jun
————
Radhi
Razin
Ratna
————
Saiful
Sani
Sarah
Shakila
Sherin (Yi Xin)
Shikin
Shi Min
Shu Min
Sya
Syakirah
————
Wei Wei
Wendy
Weng Hon
————
Yi Xuan (Shiin)
Yue Han
Special links:
CeMTA (Drama) Blog
Ms Angeline
Class Blog - 1A/03 ['o9]
Meet The Illusi♠nist:
Adib
Aiba
Aidyl
Amelia
Andrew
Atiiyah
Azizah
————
Berwin
Belson
————
Chloe
Clara
————
Darlene*♦
Dickson (Snoopy)
Donn
————
Elvis
Eugene
————
Faezzah
Faezzah [2]
Faiz
Faizal (Bear)
Fiqah♦
Fyeqa
————
Gabriel
Gary's Lover Den
Gillian
Gladys
Grace
Guan Ting (GT)
Guo Wei
————
Hafiz Y.
Haziyah
————
Irsyad
————
Jaclyn♦
Jamie
Jason
Jia Hao
Jiekie
Jian Sheng
Jiayi
Jun Rong (JR)
————
Ken
————
Lee Ying
Leon
————
Marcus
————
Naqiah*
————
Pearline♦
Pei Jun
————
Radhi
Razin
Ratna
————
Saiful
Sani
Sarah
Shakila
Sherin (Yi Xin)
Shikin
Shi Min
Shu Min
Sya
Syakirah
————
Wei Wei
Wendy
Weng Hon
————
Yi Xuan (Shiin)
Yue Han
Interesting links/blogs: (Scroll down)
The Other Side Of D
+*My MSN Community*+
+*^My MSN Space^*+
+*D-Illusionist: The Mighty One*+
+My Blog Of Poems+
+ + + + + +
Sports
Andriy Shevchenko Official Website
Arjen Robben Official Website
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Daily Mail
ESPNStar.com
Football Channel Website
Football Crazy
FourFourTwo
Kickette
Livescores
Michael Ballack Official Website
Petr Cech Official Website
Roger Federer Official Website
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Sky Sports
+ + + + + +
+*#-OTHERS-#*+
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Felicia Chin
FLOWERPOD (Forum)
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Friendster
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MTV Asia
Rockson
Seventeen Mag
Teen Vogue
The Tera Club
Viwawa
Web Comic (Anema)
Xiaxue (Wendy - Star Blogger)
Your Guys XXXposed
+ + + + + +
My favourite links:
♥Football 365
♥Kickette
♥Facebook
♥Skysports
♥SoccerManager.com
♥Barclays Premier League
♥Teen Vogue
♥Flowerpod
♥CozyCot
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+*-*+